‘Tis the season to be jolly. From BDSM accessories to online shibari classes, here’s our list of everything we want this holiday season. Of course, we checked it twice. That said, we don’t care if you were naughty or nice. Ahead, the 23 best sex-positive gifts to shop right now.
Hey, Siri! Play “S&M” by Rihanna. Seriously though, the made-to-order acrylic paddles from this queer, woman-owned company are a dream for booties.
Buy: $40-55 at Glutton for Punishment
Greedy: Notes From a Bisexual Who Wants Too Much by Jen Winston
A hilarious and whip-smart collection of essays, offering an intimate look at bisexuality, gender, and, of course, sex.
Buy: $18.00 MSRP at Bookshop.org
It’s so pretty and low profile, strangers will compliment you on it. Pick from gold, silver, or rose gold.
Buy: $79.99 at CollarAmor
Shibari Study
Whether you want to get tied up solo, alongside a partner or even a platonic friend, Shibari Study offers step-by-step courses for all skill levels on its subscription-based platform.
Buy: $25 for a one month gift card
Zeep
We love the gender-affirming toys from queer-owned Cute Little Fuckers. The newest addition, Zeep, is non-phallic (refreshing!), functional (for all bodies!), adorable AF (sometimes, looks matter!). Also, it comes in two yummy shades of green.
Buy: $69 at Cute Little Fuckers
P.S. Condoms
If there was ever a year to make a statement about “your body, your choice,” 2021 was it. For every person on your holiday list who wants to get it on, give ‘em a stash of these 100% vegan, super-thin condoms.
Buy: $19-20 at P.S. Condoms
BLOW Lubricant
From the person who brought butt masks to the world, we now have BLOW, a USDA Certified Organic, Full-Spectrum CBD + CBG oral (edible) lubricant. Warm a few drops up in your hands or place a few drops on your tongue – there are so many possibilities for pleasure.
Buy: $69.00 at Bawdy
Hand Woven Scarf
Trans adult performer, Trip Richards, channels dreamy desert hues in his handwoven goods. His Etsy shop restocks most Saturday mornings and sells out in a blink, so set a reminder and snag one of his woven beauties.
Buy: $79 and up at WolfHeadWeaving
Open: An Uncensored Memoir of Love, Liberation, and Non-Monogamy by Rachel Krantz
An award-winning journalist delves into the growing trend toward relationships—including her own—that push love beyond the familiar borders of monogamy.
Buy: $28.00 MSRP at Bookshop.org
Hemp Boxer Briefs
Cozy winter wear is a must and it all starts with the right undergarments. WAMA’s super soft hemp boxers, briefs, and bralettes are high-quality basics that are comfy enough to sleep in.
Buy: $24 at WAMA Underwear
Leather Strap-On Dildo Harness
If you’re looking for a super comfortable, strap-on harness, this is it. Unlike harnesses that use buckles and never fit quite right, this harness uses two d-rings for a fully adjustable fit – even for plus sizes.
Buy: $75 at Split Peaches
101 Kinky Things Even You Can Do by Kate Sloan
Whether you’re a seasoned kinkster or a curious pleasure-seeker, Kate Sloan makes kink accessible in this gorgeously illustrated book.
Buy: $19.98 MSRP at Booskhop.org
Orgasm Candle
This Canadian-based small business sells handcrafted candles – with a twist. Each candle has a secret hidden inside from folks who’ve confessed something anonymously online.
Buy: $22.50 at Konfession
Glow and Tell Glow in the Dark Couple’s Kit
Starlight, star bright, the first box of treats you see tonight. I wish I may, I wish I might have the wish I wish tonight. May this sexy trio – a buzzing bullet, satin blindfold, and mini magic wand, give you all the good vibes you wish tonight.
Buy: $74.99 at Lovehoney
Linolicious Prints
Whether you’re into ball gags or rope bondage, foot jobs, or puppy play, this self-taught UK creative adds sex positivity to their original nude, erotic, and sex-positive linocut prints.
Buy: Prices vary at Etsy
Build Your Own Thrusting Dildo
Close your eyes and imagine your perfect toy for penetrative sex. Now, cue this build-your-own self-thrusting vibrator (choose from 5 shapes and 4 colors). Created by a husband-and-wife team of aerospace engineers, these fucking machine-style toys can be customized for everything from G-spot stimulation to anal penetration. Sometimes, dreams do come true.
Buy: $166 and up at The Thruster
Headero
This new app creates a safe space for everyone (inclusive of all sexualities and gender identities) to pursue oral and sexual pleasure with other consenting adults. “Bliss Mode” allows users some cool extra features, like unlimited profile views and the ability to filter profiles based on kinks.
Buy: $40.00 for three months at Headero
The Layer
Let’s face it: Nobody likes sleeping in the dreaded wet spot. If you’re someone who likes to make a menstrual or ejaculatory mess, this thin, foldable blanket is your sexy time savior. Plus, it will save you from doing loads of laundry, which may not be the reason for the season, but it is pretty damn nice.
Buy: $69 at GetTheLayer
Little Pleasures Gift Set
Pleasure is your birthright, and this fab gift set from Le Wand, is filled with ample possibilities to feel good. It comes with two chrome mini-vibes, a textured silicone sleeve and ring, a cute enamel pin, travel pouch, and USB charging cable to keep all your gear ready-to-go.
Buy: $190 at Le Wand
Luxe Beaver Box
If you want to spoil your partner with luxe sensual delights, this box is for you. A Maude Burn No.1 massage candle and High On Love chocolate body paint let you get handsy with your love. The Lelo Tiani 2 is a sexy, remote-controlled, c-shaped massager – perfect for couples' play. Condoms and personal moisturizer round out the mix.
Buy: $165 at Beaver Box
The Scratch and Tickle
Scratch and caress your sweetie with this tactile gift set of two velvety soft rabbit fur gloves and two hand made claws. Whether you’re the giver or the receiver, this duo of sensation play toys will make you tingle.
Buy: $67.97 at EverybodySquirm.com
BLOW & GLOW Limited-Edition Kit
New year, new you? Learn to better pleasure your partner in the new year with these limited-edition goodies meant to spark intimate fun and games. The BLOW & GLOW Kit includes two bestselling sex toys, MANTA and NŌS, a scrunchie to allow couples to signal to their partner when things are about to get fun, a massage candle, playful games to spark connections, and access to exclusive sex tip videos from XBIZ’s 2020 Sexpert of the Year, Ashley Manta.
Buy it: $239 at FUN FACTORY

Ryn Pfeuffer is a versatile print and digital writer specializing in sex, lifestyle, and relationship topics. Over the past two decades, her work has appeared in more than 100 media outlets including Marie Claire, Playboy, Refinery29, The Globe and Mail, The Washington Post, WIRED, and Thrillist.
She adopted a pseudonym and was AVN’s (Adult Video Network) first female porn reviewer – while penning children’s books at the same time. More recently, she is the author of 101 Ways to Rock Online Dating (2019). She lives in Seattle with her rescue dog, Mimi. You can find her on Twitter @rynpfeuffer or IG @ryn_says