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Kitchen table polyamory is a style of non-monogamy where partners and their partners are all intertwined. People who participate in kitchen table polyamory have friendly platonic relationships with the partners of their partners. Kitchen table polyamory gets its name because all participants in this relationship structure would feel comfortable sitting around a kitchen table together.
Kitchen table polyamory is the opposite of parallel polyamory.
Kitchen table polyamory is not considered the default style of polyamory. However, polyamorous people may prefer this type of relationship structure if they are very social. People who prefer kitchen table polyamory want to know and become friends with their partner’s partners. They may also appreciate the simpler logistics of kitchen table polyamory. It’s not so important for practitioners of kitchen table polyamory to worry about scheduling or compartmentalizing their relationships.
However, boundaries should and do exist in kitchen table polyamory. While all participants in kitchen table polyamory have some kind of relationship, the participants should make sure they don’t interfere with their partners’ romantic relationships. They should also give the romantic relationships time to progress away from the platonic group interactions.
The community people build through kitchen table polyamory may go beyond the participants of romantic relationships and their partners. It may also include any children these adults have and their extended family members. It wouldn’t be unusual for people practicing kitchen table polyamory to get together for play dates, birthdays, and family functions.
Difficulties can occur when the partners of partners don’t get along. In these circumstances, it may be easier to transition into a parallel polyamory style of interaction, rather than forcing incompatible personalities together. Kitchen table polyamory can also be difficult for introverts and people who prefer one-on-one time to group interactions. Getting to know a partner’s partner can also trigger feelings of jealousy or inadequacy. Couples should discuss honestly and openly what works best for them and whether they’d enjoy kitchen table polyamory.