Feeling frisky and adventurous as the year comes to a close? Don't worry; I get it too. With the realization that an entire year has passed me by, I feel that urge to do something "new" - and ensure I'm "living life to the fullest". Since I'm not a huge risk-taker, that isn't going to look like scheduling a meeting with a skydiving team - but it could very well look like choosing to mix up my very-predictable sex life. (Sex writers enjoy their cozy sexual ruts too)
But having sex in the water isn't nearly as seamless as movies and TV shows make it out to be. In fact, it actually is likely going to take you more planning than just having sex in the bed - where everything you need has been perfectly placed within easy reach.
So, let's dip in to all of the things I think you should before having sex in the water. Whether that "water" is a pool, pond, bathtub, shower, ocean, or river, some of your concerns remain the same.
First off:
Let's get the big boy out of the way: water can (and does) kill. Having sex in water isn't a risk-free activity. (Sex isn't risk-free either, but now we're adding the risk of water on top of sex risks.)
Luckily for us, there are ways to eliminate some of the largest risks of sex in the water.
- Ensure where you're having sex isn't too slippery. This can mean using a bathmat in the shower and being extremely careful with lube.
- Only have sex in water when you're entirely sober; inebriation from any substance can reduce your reflexes, judgment, and balance.
- Where possible, don't have sex while standing in water. Sit, kneel, or otherwise lower your center of gravity to avoid more dangerous falls.
- Avoid any type of sex (like oral sex!) that involves someone's head going underwater.
- Use stable positioning aids to your advantage. Shower benches, pool steps, and the flat surface of the ground make it less likely you'll slip or have an issue. Be careful adding suction-cup position aids; a suction cup aid that slips off the wall when you're depending on it can be the cause of a fall.
- Know exactly how deep the water is - and choose an area where you can easily touch the ground if it's a deep body of water.
- Don't have sex in any body of water unless you can swim.
- Even if you can swim, keep floating aids nearby just in case.
- Remember, you don't actually have to have penetrative intercourse in the water at all! The balancing act of fitting two bodies together is one of the riskiest parts of aquatic sex. Instead, enjoy lots of hot foreplay - then move onto the stable, dry ground if you want to have intercourse.
Essentially, think about where you're having sex and what dangers might happen there. Then, do your best to eliminate them or control them ahead of time - long before you delve into the passionate parts.
Download the guide: Dive in to Aqua Sex
If you've tried to have sex in the water before, you'll already know that water washes away the body's natural vaginal lubrication. When you're trying to have sex, however, that same cleansing "good thing" can actually be problematic. If you're used to the sex toys of ol', you might be surprised to find that almost every high-end sex toy on the market today is waterproof. With the invention of magnetic charging designs, the channels for water to get inside of the toy (and break it) have mostly been eliminated - so your best buzzing friend is free to join you on the action! ...can come too. Especially if you're working with a limited timeframe, adding sex toys into the aquatic sex mix can ensure that everyone comes away from your experience feeling satisfied.
That's why bringing lube is so vital.
You can't just bring any ol' lube though! Aquatic sex is one of the times where it pays to be picky with your lube.
You see, water-based lubricant washes away easily in water. Since you're planning on having some passionate sex in water, you can see how this might be a problem. The thing that makes water-based lube so convenient (its easy clean-up) becomes a downside when we're looking at having sex in the water.
Instead, most people opt for silicone-based lube. It stands strong against water - keeping its slick properties even when dunked into water. However, silicone-based lubes may not be compatible with silicone material sex toys - and you'll want to be careful where the drops land.
While you can easily rub water-based lube off the shower floor if you drip a bit of excess, you can't do the same for silicone-based lube. It will remain slippery until you get down and scrub it with soap and a brush. This means you need to be very, very careful when applying silicone-based lube - or you might end up making your shower floor dangerously slippery. I recommend stepping out of the shower onto a folded towel to put on any lube - which ensures the excess doesn't make it onto the surfaces you need to stay dry for traction and stability.
That means your favorite sex toys like your Satisfyer:
However, most sex toys may be degraded by sand, saltwater and chlorine, and are not rated for deep-sea diving or extremely deep water. If you're playing in the shower or bath, you'll have no problem, but if you're hoping to fuck on the bottom of your 10-foot pool, you might consider foregoing the sex toys for that adventure.
Especially if you're having sex in a body of water, it can create a weightlessness that isn't possible on dry land. This means that you and your partner can explore a much larger variety of sex positions. Your partner doesn't need to be able to lift your entire body weight anymore; they only need to be able to lift a fraction of it.
This opens up a whole new world of gravity-defying standing sex positions that may have been entire inaccessible to you before!
Read: 8 Shower Sex Positions That Are Both Possible and Fantastic Do you know where most of us don't keep our safer sex equipment? In the bathtub or next to a pond. This means that everything you use to keep your sex as safe as possible needs to be planned ahead.
Take your condoms, dental dams, sponge, menstrual disc, or lube with you when you go out to play in the water (wherever that water happens to be!). If you want to keep things as spontaneous as possible, have a "go bag" with everything already packed. You can just grab it and know you'll be ready!
Where, exactly, are you having sex in the water? If it's the shower or bath, you're fine, but if you're hoping to enjoy some passionate play in a pool, hot tub, or natural body of water (like the ocean or river!), the water isn't probably something that you'll want to slide inside of the body.
Hot tubs, for example, feature chemicals that help keep the water as free of germs and bacteria as possible. Those same chemicals that are harsh on germs and bacteria can be harsh on the "good" bacteria found in the vaginal canal or anus. Think of it like douching with some really, really harsh chemicals - and you can see the problem.
Oceans and other bodies of water, on the other hand, are most definitely filled with bacteria - and may contain parasites too. Again, these substances aren't particularly friendly to the inside of the body - and can cause infections or further problems.
If you're hoping to enjoy sex in water that isn't designed for bathing or drinking, consider keeping the penetrative aspects to a minimum. Instead, consider penetration-free pleasure with a focus on mutual pleasure (and potential orgasms!) without penetration. A good soaping and shower can be a good idea before choosing to move on to penetration - to avoid any of these damaging water buddies making it inside of the body.
Test yourself: Are You an Aqua Sex Pro? It's a universal experience: you're enjoying the best hot shower of your life - and then the hot water runs out, and it's now terrible.
The same happens during sex in the water, too. Unless you are at a hotel or have an endless hot water heater, if you're having shower sex, you WILL run out of hot water - so you're on the clock to ensure you finish whatever you want before that happens.
If you're in a bathtub full of water, that water temperature is going to ever-so-slowly cool down, so make sure you're ready to top-up your water or end things early. (I recommend starting your bathwater at warmer-than-wanted to help reduce this.)
Of course, this list of top tips isn't the only place Kinkly has to learn about aquatic sex. If you're planning on making things extra wet and wild, I'd also recommend doing a bit of extra reading with:
Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.
