6 Steps to Choosing a Flogger

Published: FEBRUARY 6, 2015 | Updated: NOVEMBER 13, 2021
Floggers can provide different sensations depending upon the material they are made from. It is very important that you know how to safely use a flogger with or on your partner. These 6 steps can help you pick the perfect flogger for you!

Maybe you've seen floggers while purchasing other toys or maybe you heard something about their pleasurable aspects. No matter where you received the inspiration, floggers can be an enjoyable impact play experience. Do you think that being "hit" has to hurt? Think again. Many floggers were designed to give what is known as a thuddy sensation. It's a sensation that many compare to receiving a deep tissue massage. Sound luxurious? I thought so!


Basic Flogging Guidelines

Before we begin, I want to explain some basic flogging guidelines. After all, if you're new to floggers, it's important that you have a general idea on how to avoid hurting someone. As a beginner, it's best to use a flogger on the butt or the back. It's vital that you avoid the kidney areas and the spine. If you're flogging the butt, it's easy to pull up a thick skirt or lay a thick blanket over the kidney and tailbone area to add extra protection in case of an accident. It's important that you start with small, light hits until you're sure of your aim. Do not overestimate your ability. It could severely harm your partner if you're not careful. Understand that flogging can definitely be fun and orgasmic, but there are also risks involved.

You and your partner should also agree on a safe word. This is a word that, if spoken, means that all activity will instantly stop. This allows you both to communicate freely without any concern about miscommunication. This should be a word that wouldn't regularly be spoken during sex. Words like "red," "elephant," or "table" are good choices. It should be something out of the ordinary that will make you both pause. Don't choose a word that is overly complicated. Terms such as "thermonuclear dynamics" have no place as safe words.


Now that we have some general safety information out of the way, you may feel quite lost about picking a flogger. Which ones are beginner friendly? What will feel best for you and your partner? Are there specific materials you should be looking for? What if you want to share it?

There are a lot of things to consider when picking out a flogger, but you don't need to feel overwhelmed. Just follow these 6 steps to choose the right flogger for you. You'll have a much better understanding of what you want and need in your first flogger purchase. There's no wrong way to use this information. Use all of it or use part of it; the important thing is that you feel more comfortable!


Step 1: Pick Out Colors

You might not realize it, but the color choice of your flogger determines a lot about what selection will be available to you. Quite a few floggers are produced in a sultry black or red color. If you want something more playful like light pink or blue, you may have to search a bit harder. If you have a favorite color or if you want to portray a certain mood during your playtime, selecting the right color is important.

Step 2: Know Your Budget

Floggers run across the entire price range. For a professional, weighted flogger, you can easily spend hundreds of dollars. You can even find people who can make a custom flogger for you if the price is right. For casual, beginner friendly floggers, prices can be as low as $20. If your budget is an important factor, you should decide how much you want to spend before you go shopping. It's very possible to get a good, high quality flogger for less than $50. It won't be weighted or made from luxurious materials, but it will work just fine for a playful evening.

Step 3: Understand the Basics of Flogger Materials

Different materials and fabrics will produce different sensations. Of course, there are floggers that fall outside of this guide. The more firm a material is, the more intense the sensation it can provide. The lighter a flogger is, the more stingy and painful the flogger can feel. Heavier floggers with heavier materials tend to provide more of the "massage" sensation that was mentioned earlier. These "massage" floggers are usually made from heavy suede or leather.

If at all possible, it really helps to try the flogger out in person. Making sure no one is around, try a light smack of the flogger onto your thigh. Do NOT do it on the wrist or forearm. It's very easy to hurt yourself or nerves on your arm.


Step 4: Read Product Reviews

Reading about floggers is one of the most important things you can do. If possible, read some reviews or talk to people who have used the particular flogger that you are thinking about buying. They will be able to tell you the type of sensation it provides as well as how the flogger has held up during its use. The Internet is an amazing place for reading reviews. Just do a quick Internet search of your product name plus the word "review" and see what pops up.

Step 5: Know How You Will Store and Care for Your Flogger

You'll need a specific storage plan for your flogger. If you just plan on shoving it into a drawer, I'd recommend that you purchase a cheaper flogger. Floggers are really meant to be stored with their flogger strands laying out flat. This means laying them flat on a surface or hanging them from something (like a hook in the back of a closet). Otherwise, the strands of material can get creases and may not behave in the same way as they were designed. Many floggers include a loop at the end of the handle to make it simple to hang up your toy for storage.

Flogger care is another consideration. Leather type material will require different care than cheaper floggers. You need to know whether or not you must clean the flails and keep them conditioned. Without conditioning, some materials will crack and quickly ruin.


Step 6: Consider Whether or Not Your Flogger Will Be Shared

If this is just a flogger for you and one partner, this step doesn't apply. If you have different partners or if you are considering using the flogger with multiple people, you should give some thought to the material. Fabric-like materials can be difficult to sterilize between partners. While there are only a few in production, you may want to look into a silicone flogger since it is simple to sterilize. However, be aware that silicone floggers have a more intense sensation than fabric floggers. Leather floggers area easy to sterilize as well.

For Further Reading

I hope you'll also consider getting a book that will help you with the safety and enjoyment of your new flogger. There are a lot of books out there. Reading one will give you important safety and use information. A highly recommended book is "SM101" by Jay Wiseman.


Using the 6 steps above, look through your favorite online retailer's website and figure out exactly what you want. If possible, visit your nearby adult toy retailer and try to get a touch and feel for the various floggers available. When you find what you think is perfect for you, why not purchase a couple of your favorites and find out exactly what you enjoy in a flogger? Happy shopping!

Mistress Kay

Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.

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