Kinkly: Who’s your target reader?
Kevin Patterson: Unlike most outlets, Poly Role Models isn’t a showcase for monogamous folks who want to learn what polyamory is. It’s meant for polyamorous or poly-curious people who want to see themselves represented. When representation is poor and you don’t see yourself reflected, it’s easy to just assume that polyamory isn’t for you. My blog works against that.
Kinkly: What’s unique about your blog?
Kevin Patterson: It’s an interview series. As a blogger, I’m not the one creating new content. I’m more of a curator. I manage a collection of beautiful works of self-expression. Also, the blog is a resource for other resources. Something I love to do is promote other people’s work – especially that of people who have appeared in the blog.
Kinkly: What is the topic you find yourself covering most often and why?
Kevin Patterson: The topic that carries the most is that of identity. When someone says, “I’m black (or bisexual or trans or autistic etc.) and this is how it affects my polyamory,” there are hundreds of other people that need to hear that and reference it against their own experiences. It’s the most important aspect of Poly Role Models.
Kinkly: What was your most popular post ever? Why do you think it drew so many readers?
Kevin Patterson: Probably the profile of Tikva Wolf, the artist behind the Kimchi Cuddles comic stips. Her strip is long running and so easy to relate to. It’s no wonder that people were super interested in the person who creates it.
Kinkly: What’s the best thing about writing a sex blog?
Kevin Patterson: Well, it’s not a sex blog, but the best part is the people I serve. Whenever someone tells me that an interview meant a lot to them or helped them find their way, it makes continuing to do the work really worthwhile.
Kinkly: What’s the worst thing about it?
Kevin Patterson: Point blank, Poly Role Models is the most inclusive showcase for polyamory available anywhere...but I still always want it to be better. It’s really hard seeing any identity that isn’t represented on the blog. It’s not always under my control, but it feels like a personal failing.
Kinkly: OK, now for the good stuff: Give us your best tip for great sex.
Kevin Patterson: Listen. I know that sounds simple but the bar is super low. Just listening to your partners verbal and nonverbal cues carries so much weight. Most people don’t even bother.