It’s no secret that men and women masturbate to a wide variety of hot hookup scenarios. For years, my go-to was pretty consistent: A certain blonde haired/blued-eye chef I was friends with would pull me into the bathroom at The Ruby Room, a dive bar in Oakland, hike my skirt up, then fuck me doggy style in the glow of the dim red lights. As years went by, the fantasy got dirtier, with him eventually finishing on my face before I’d wipe it off then return to my Manhattan. Sure, it’s not the most creative of fantasies, but I could cue up this image and come in a matter of minutes – every single time.
Playing with yourself has numerous health benefits and if you need a hot fantasy to maximize your pleasure, that’s perfectly OK.
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Masturbation is a healthy part of sexuality. The better you connect with your body (and orgasm), the better the lover you’ll be. Playing with yourself has numerous health benefits and if you need a hot fantasy to maximize your pleasure, that’s perfectly OK.
Need a little fodder for the spank bank? We got a few people to open up about the steamy fantasies they use to get themselves worked up.
Need more erotic reading? Check out LELO's collection of erotic fiction.
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The idea of being blindfolded and restrained in a public setting gets me excited. Perhaps at a friend’s dinner party? The thought of being vulnerable is so arousing. After dinner, all the guests at the party take turns on me. I don’t know who’s penetrating me – I can only guess. The idea of being “used” by a group of horny people, I think, is what turns me on the most.
-Danielle, 45 I get off on dynamics where I have a debt to repay. Most recently, my boyfriend and I role played a scene where I was a hotel guest who racked up an obscene bill from watching too much porn. I didn’t have the funds to pay the bill, so I found alternative means to repay the hotel manager. There was a lot of begging and groveling involved and all of it tapped into my submissive tendencies.
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Alice, 28 I think about my much older neighbor. Going to her house, asking her to role play as my secret mommy. She forces me to wear her panties, then sits on my face until she spills her juices all over my mouth. Once mommy is satisfied, I’m allowed to jerk off. If I’m a good boy, sometimes she lets me come on her tits. If she only knew … -Jeff, 37
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I get massages every week and frequently fantasize about my super-hot therapist turning it into a medical situation. Like, I have a serious condition with my dick that can only be cured by a hand job or oral sex. The idea of my therapist assuming the role of a doctor or nurse and me needing a thorough physical exam gets me hard every time.
-Kai, 37 Here’s my fantasy: I’m an avid online dating app user. This goes against every safety precaution I take, but the idea of inviting a total stranger into my house, not exchanging a single word and fucking him silly does it for me. Only after we’ve both come a bunch of times would there be any conversation.
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-Lisa, 41 I’m out running with my partner. We’re on our usual loop at the nearby park. He grabs me roughly by my wrist and pulls me into the nearby woods. He drags me deep into the trees as he scouts for the perfect spot. Once he finds a tree he likes, he shoves me face-front against the trunk, pulls down my running shorts and thrusts himself deep inside me from behind. We can see and hear people not so far away and the idea of getting caught is irresistible. -Paula, 32
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I was not a cool girl in high school. In fact, I didn’t lose my virginity until after I graduated from college. I often fantasize what it would be like to have sex with all the guys I wanted to fuck in high school and college. In my fantasy, they all line up, begging to fuck me, and I take them one by one, kind of like my own greatest hits reel. Most of them are married and have kids now, but it’s still hot to think about.
-Jenny, 39 My wife loves to be dominated. Tied-up, handcuffed, spanked, gagged – you name it. And I guess as the male, I feel like I should take on this role. I jerk off to the idea of her “turning the tables” and surprising me one day when I come home from work. Most of the time, I imagine her as a strict teacher type or the mean babysitter I had when I was a kid. I can’t complain about our sex life, it’s pretty good, but it would be nice to switch things up from time to time. -Tom, 35 This isn’t the most creative of fantasies, but it works for me. I’ve had MFF threesomes, but I really want to have sex with two men. I love the idea of being the center of attention of two tall, strong men with big, beautiful penises. Like Hemsworth brothers beautiful. Bonus if the guys are into each other too. -Maddie, 50
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Ryn Pfeuffer
Ryn Pfeuffer is a versatile print and digital writer specializing in sex, lifestyle, and relationship topics. She got her start in the mid-90s at the Philadelphia Weekly, managing a 10-page section of the newspaper and more than 500 lonely hearts.Her professional stock skyrocketed when she started writing a saucy (and pre-Carrie-Bradshaw-era) dating advice column called “Ask Me Anything.” She appeared regularly on local radio stations and late-night TV as an expert on everything from grooming habits to threesomes.Over the past two decades, her work has appeared in more than 100 media outlets including Marie Claire, Playboy, Refinery29, The Globe and Mail, The Washington Post, WIRED, and Thrillist. She adopted a pseudonym and was AVN’s (Adult Video Network) first female porn reviewer – while penning children’s books at the same time.More recently, she is the author of 101 Ways to Rock Online Dating (2019). She lives in Seattle with her rescue dog, Mimi. You can find her on Twitter @rynpfeuffer or IG @ryn_says
