Facebook Twitter
Sex toy reviews

I Tried a Realistic Horse Dildo. Here’s What It Was Like.

Published: NOVEMBER 9, 2023
If you're seeking your sex toy Everest, a realistic horse dildo might just be what you're looking for.

When I got the chance to try out Hankey's Toys Horse Dildo, I wondered if I had the record-breaking skills of Secretariat. I am not a size queen, although I do like the feeling of fullness. But could I play with a realistic horse dildo without feeling like a telephone pole was impaling me? I was determined to find out.

Advertisement

What is a horse dildo?

Horse dildos are a niche product not commonly found in mainstream sex toy stores. Realistic dildos are meant to replicate the look and feel of a natural penis – in this case, a horse penis.

Needless to say, horse cock dildos are often bigger and more elongated than based on human anatomy. Hankey's Toys Horse Dildo features realistic details like veins and a gently flared tip. When it comes to this category of sex toys, girth also varies, but it's usually thicker than the usual dildo. Horse cock dildos can come in surprisingly large sizes as well.

Horse dildos have become increasingly popular among individuals interested in zoophilia. Zoophilia, also known as bestiality, is a paraphilia involving a sexual attraction to or sexual activity with animals. While engaging in sexual acts with animals is widely condemned behavior for a host of reasons, there's nothing wrong with fantasy, and fucking a realistic horse dildo is fair game.

Advertisement
The Product: Hankey's Toys Horse Dildo

Hankey's Toys has built a merited reputation for crafting premium silicone dildos and a range of adult novelty products. The company goes the extra mile by offering customization options, from dildo size and firmness to color. The company also excels at online community engagement, addressing customer concerns and questions. So, not only did I get a horse dildo, I also got one that I had selected for its size (L, XL, XXXL and 4XL), firmness, color, color effect and whether it includes vacuum attachment. That's a pretty unprecedented level of customizability for what is already a very unique toy.

A side view of a black horse cock dildo from Mr Hankey'sThis realistic horse dildo from Hankey's Toys comes in a variety of sizes, colors and firmness levels.

Why are people into horse dildos?

Horse dildos may be a niche interest; still, a quick search for "horse dildo" on Pornhub yields 10 pages of results - there are definitely devotees. There are several reasons people may be into impossibly hung horse dildos.

Advertisement

Horse dildos may be a niche interest; still, a quick search for "horse dildo" on Pornhub yields 10 pages of results - there are definitely devotees.

Some individuals may find larger genitals visually arousing. In addition, the sheer size of these dildos can be very pleasurable as they create a feeling of "fullness," both vaginally and anally. When a horse dildo is inserted into the vagina, the flared head produces a popping sensation, and the larger size allows for deep penetration.

Like, really deep.

Advertisement

How big is a horse dildo?

The size of a horse's penis can vary, but it is typically quite large compared to the size of the animal itself. According to equine resources on Google, when fully erect, a horse's penis can measure anywhere from 18 to 24 inches in length or even more, depending on the individual horse. The girth or circumference is also substantial, usually around 5 to 6 inches or more. Hankey's Toys Horse Dildos come in four sizes – L, XL, XXXL and 4XL. The dildos range from 13.75 to 18.25 inches in length and 7.25 to 10.75 inches in circumference, so they're a fairly accurate representation of a real horse cock.

Mr Hankey's realistic horse dildo urethra viewAll the details on this realistic horse dildo from Hankey's Toys have been carefully rendered. It looks like the real deal!

Are horse dildos safe?

Sometimes, size matters, especially in this case. Horse dildos are not an entry-level sex toy. Due to the size of these products, it's imperative that you not use a horse dildo until you are sure that the dimensions (length and girth) and form are safely within your level of experience and comfort. People often do this via vaginal or anal stretching practices. It's crucial to go slow and never exert pressure to force insertion. If you feel pain or discomfort, stop using the dildo immediately. You can incrementally build up your ability for penetration. Remember, practice makes perfect.

Advertisement

Read: The Beginner's Guide to Anal Stretching

Testing Out a Realistic Horse Dildo from Hankey's Toys

When you buy a Hankey's Toys Horse Dildo online, the site offers four sizes (L, XL, XXXL and 4XL) and four firmness levels to choose from (Extra Firm, Medium Firm, 75%, 40% and Packer Soft). The "Medium Firm" level of firmness is more like a fully erect penis. In contrast, the "75% Soft" firmness is similar to a penis that is 75-80% erect and more flexible. I ordered a Medium-Firm Horse Dildo in size large.

When the horse dildo arrived, it was discreetly packaged. Although the box was quite heavy, nothing was readily identifiable about its contents. Phew. I have other sex toys from Hankey's Toys, so I was mentally prepared for how massive the toy would be. Still, when I opened the box, I spent some time handling the silicone horse cock, to, umm, try and get a handle on the task at hand.

Advertisement

Mr Hankey's realistic horse dildo displayed upright beside a woman's hand for scaleHankey's Toys' Realistic Horse Dildo is a beast.

I had a plan of attack that involved slow foreplay, deep breathing and a lot of lube. (Note: Hankey's Toys can be used with silicone lube.) I laid my Liberator Fascinator waterproof blanket on my bed, picked up a bottle of silicone lube, lit a candle and queued up my most relaxing Spotify playlist. I played with my nipples and pussy for a good half-hour until I was aroused and ready. My first attempt was a total bomb – when it came time to penetrate myself, I couldn't stop laughing at the fact I was trying to fuck myself with a realistic horse dildo.

My first attempt was a total bomb – when it came time to penetrate myself, I couldn't stop laughing at the fact I was trying to fuck myself with a realistic horse dildo.

Over the following two weeks, I tried almost daily to penetrate myself with the horse dildo. It wasn't so much the 10" insertable shaft that was daunting; the 8.9" circumference near the head proved challenging. And, while I could eventually accommodate a small portion of the tip, I have yet to slide the whole beast inside successfully. (Goals, right?)

That said, the thought of eventually being able to fuck this massive sex toy is arousing enough – for the time being – and the gentle pressure of the head against my vaginal opening has been enough stimulation for me to orgasm. I'm fully invested in training to take this dildo, but I'll continue at my efforts at a slow gallop for now.

Tips When Taking a Horse Dildo for a Ride

If you're new to using horse dildos or even other realistic animal dildos (Hankey's sells lots of those too), it's crucial to start with a smaller, more manageable size. Going too big, too soon, can result in a painful experience or, even worse, an injury.

Like using any sex toy, it's essential to have a safe and hygienic experience, so even if you're playing with a brand-new dildo, wash it in soap and hot water or with a sex toy cleaner before you use it.

Next, make sure you have a long-lasting lubricant on hand. There are also plenty of anal-specific products on the market if you plan to use your horse dildo for anal play. Remember, the anus doesn't naturally self-lubricate like the vagina, so extra lube is vital.

Try to relax as much as possible before you begin play. Setting the mood and deep breathing helps. Then, get into a position that works for you. I tried lying on my back with a pillow elevating my hips, allowing me to raise and widen my legs. Alternatively, you can try and squat and lower yourself onto the horse cock. I didn't try to insert the toy anally. I want to conquer my pussy before engaging in more advanced play. If I'd successfully inserted the head of the horse dildo, I imagine my body would've become more relaxed.

How to Use a Horse Dildo Anally

Some people are really into big anal toys! If this is where your journey has taken you, be sure to go slow and use lots of lube! Some may be concerned that using a horse cock dildo will stretch their anus permanently. In reality, your body's natural elasticity should prevent this from happening, and you will regain muscle tightness within a day or two of use.

Whether using a large dildo like this vaginally or anally, never do so without ample lube and foreplay, as you could injure yourself. If you're playing solo, paying attention to your body and not forcing penetration is imperative. And if you've enlisted the help of a partner, consent, trust and communication are key.

Hankey's Toys Realistic Horse Dildo: My Verdict

I've been writing about sex and reviewing sex toys for over two decades. My mouth and holes have sucked and fucked a lot in the name of journalism. Ditto in the name of pure, unapologetic pleasure. That said, Hankey's Toys Realistic Horse Dildo is officially my sex toy Everest. I've tried every which way to consume this sex toy entirely - unsuccessfully - but I am not giving up. I'm a massive fan of having my vaginal opening teased by a toy, fingers, or the tip of a cock, so I will continue to practice and push myself to the limit until I accomplish the extraordinary achievement of feeling the fullness and infamous "pop" a horse cock dildo provides. Until then, I'll enjoy "just the tip."

Advertisement
Advertisement
Ryn Pfeuffer

Ryn Pfeuffer is a versatile print and digital writer specializing in sex, lifestyle, and relationship topics. She got her start in the mid-90s at the Philadelphia Weekly, managing a 10-page section of the newspaper and more than 500 lonely hearts.Her professional stock skyrocketed when she started writing a saucy (and pre-Carrie-Bradshaw-era) dating advice column called “Ask Me Anything.” She appeared regularly on local radio stations and late-night TV as an expert on everything from grooming habits to threesomes.Over the past two decades, her work has appeared in more than 100 media outlets including Marie Claire, Playboy, Refinery29, The Globe and Mail, The Washington Post, WIRED, and Thrillist. She adopted a pseudonym and was AVN’s (Adult Video Network) first female porn reviewer – while penning children’s books at the same time.More recently, she is the author of 101 Ways to Rock Online Dating (2019). She lives in Seattle with her rescue dog, Mimi. You can find her on Twitter @rynpfeuffer or IG @ryn_says

Latest Sex Positions