Spectatoring

When people are spectatoring, they are often monitoring and judging themselves and their partners having sex, rather than giving themselves over to the experience. The thoughts someone has while they are spectatoring are often very critical. They might worry about their body or their sexual performance, for example.

Research suggests that spectatoring can lead to less sexual satisfaction, and sex therapy often focuses on moving people away from this internal focus during sex.

Many psychologists and sex therapists believe that mindfulness can greatly enhance sexual pleasure. Mindfulness can be practiced during any activity, even mundane ones like washing dishes or eating a meal.