Are we really surprised that Nick Cage or old Marlon Brando are more awkward than sexy? I can't see how. At least for me, sex with Nicholas Cage is the stuff that nightmares are made of.
A few of these movies actually won Razzie Awards (these go to the worst films of the year) including "Showgirls" and "Gigli," although I'd argue they're still better love stories than "Twilight." Oh yeah, "Twilight" is also on this list and reminds us all that a 100-year age difference is fine as long as both people are conventionally hot. * eyeroll *
Other mocked films in this takedown vid include Madonna's "Body of Evidence" (sorry vid, but Willem DaFoe could read the phone book and still be sexy as hell), "The Matrix Reloaded,""Sliver," and "Her," a film where an uncharacteristically dumpy looking Joaquin Phoenix has a mutual masturbation scene with a computer operating system. "How would you touch me?" Um, on your keyboard, I guess? I'm certainly not saying that these films are awesome and shouldn't be mocked. The films mentioned in the video just seem to be easy targets. Ultimately, why watch a sex video if it's not gonna be hot and steamy?
Got any favorite sex scenes from Hollywood movies? Share them in the comments!
Wednesday Lee Friday is an eclectic writer of fact and fiction. She has worked as a reptile wrangler, phone sex operator, radio personality, concierge, editor, fast food manager, horror novelist, and she owns a soap shop. She prefers jobs that let her sleep during the day. Everybody knows all the best art and literature happen at night! Wednesday's work has appeared in Women's Health Interactive, Alternet, Screen Rant, The Roots of Loneliness Project and Authority Magazine. Wednesday Lee Friday was born November 24th, 1970 in Royal Oak, Michigan. It was a Tuesday. After deciding against being a ballerina, an ichthyologist, and a famous singer, she decided to become a novelist just before starting kindergarten. Wednesday went to college in Olivet, Michigan, where she majored in theater and broadcasting for some reason. Wednesday Lee Friday is a four-time published novelist, podcaster, horror fan, soap artisan, and former phonesex gal. Wednesday eats true crime for breakfast, knows enough Dothraki to buy a horse, and is a regular TV and movie reviewer for 411Mania.com. Look for her novels, anthologies, and audiobooks whereever you usually buy those things.