9 Sexy Date Ideas – and How to Plan It!

Published: JANUARY 12, 2023
With these sexy date ideas and some supplies from Spencer's, you have everything you need to renew your focus on your intimate and romantic relationships this Valentine's Day.

Valentine's Day is coming up, and you know what that means: a renewed focus on the relationships that matter to you -- especially your intimate and romantic ones.


However, you might be finding yourself at a bit of a standstill: What should you do to renew your connection with your partner? You know "date night" is the generally accepted advice, but another dinner and movie? You're getting a bit tired of seeing the latest Hollywood releases.

So, that's the million-dollar question: What sexy date ideas are out there? How can you mix up your "stereotypical" date night to end up with a date night that actually feels reconnecting instead of "Well, that was a nice Wednesday activity."

It starts with getting a bit more creative with your dates. Take some of these suggestions as inspiration, and let your mind start wandering!


1. Sexy Board Games

If you love a nice, erotic night in, consider a sexy board game. If you go this route, the board game creator has done all the heavy lifting for you; you simply have to show up, play the game, get turned on and have a great time!

There are hundreds of board game options out there, including the Behind Closed Doors board game, which is available at Spencer's.

Behind Closed Door Board Game: A box featuring a couple having sex on top of a cardboard board.Behind Closed Doors Board Game, available at Spencer's.


If this sounds like the option for you, one important consideration is that you should make sure to select a board game that matches the vibe you're going for tonight. Do you want to get passionately turned on? Do you want to learn more things about your partner? Would you like a no-pressure way to explore kinky things? No matter what you're after, there's a sexy board game out there to suit your interest. And if you're not sure what you're after, the Behind Closed Doors board game is a great option, with a little of everything. Pick yours up before Valentine's Day at Spencer's!

Don't just play your sexy board game either. Consider "setting the mood" to make your board game as potent as possible. For busy couples, this might look as simple as dimming the lights, tossing the clutter off the coffee table, and lighting a single tea light. For couples with more time, this might look like cleaning the entire living room, picking scents that feel erotic, starting a sexy playlist, and setting mood lighting. It's up to what fits in your schedule.

READ: Decorating Tips to Make Your Bedroom a Sanctuary for Sex.


2. Head to "Make-Out Point"

Remember the early days of your relationship, when simply making out in your car was the highlight of your week?

Take that same energy to your current partnership by setting yourselves up to enjoy it again! Simply drive the car to a private, secluded spot, and enjoy making out. (Bonus points if you've spent the day teasing one another so you both are already a bit amped up by the time you park!)

You also can consider placing "limits" on how far you both will go within the vehicle -- both for comfort level and risk concerns. Maybe "first base" is as far as you both are comfortable, and you can enjoy the entire drive home with a lovely, throbbing arousal until you make it back into the privacy of your own home. (Or maybe just the privacy of the garage!)


READ: How to Make Foreplay the Main Event.

3. Enjoy a Lazy Morning

You probably take "lazy mornings" to yourselves...when you're on vacation. But who says you need to spend hundreds of dollars to enjoy those same sensations? Instead, with a bit of planning, those lazy mornings can be something you have, on occasion, in your own home! Think of it like a fun "date night" -- but before the stresses of the day have begun to wear you down.

Make a pact to stay in bed for as long as possible on a specific morning. This might mean getting up and bringing breakfast back into your bed. This might simply mean snuggling up, naked, talking, for an hour or two before you get up and go on with your day. If you don't want to be naked off-the-bat, consider donning yourself or your partner in some sexy, comfy garments. Our suggestion? The Double Dare Bustier and Thong Panties set from Spencer's -- designed to fit comfortably and show off your already perfect body, this simple garment can be just the thing to turn "lazy morning" into "sexy morning."


Double Dare Bustier and Thong Panties Set. Available at Spencer's.

During this type of date, try to leave the logistical struggles of the day out of your bed -- and focus on your connection instead of pre-planning the day to come. That's where the Double Dare Bustier and Thong Panties set from Spencer's comes in handy -- it's easy to forget about your grocery list with a lace-clad lover in front of you!

The hardest part of this date can be childcare. If you're able to arrange a caretaker, do so. If your children are old enough to take care of themselves, consider an out-of-the-ordinary activity to keep them occupied. If neither of those are an option, it might be best to head to bed a bit early so you can wake up earlier and enjoy a bit of quiet to yourselves before the sun comes up.

4. Check Local Hotels and Spas for Day Rates

Maybe spending an entire night in a boutique hotel is out of the budget right now. But you might be surprised to find out that your local options offer "day rates" during the weekdays. Can you spare a long lunch instead?

Especially for hotels that cater to "romance," a lunch-time, four-hour slot may be available for your stay during the week. Not only does this make it dramatically cheaper than an evening, but it also means you may not have to worry about childcare. It's a win-win!

If the day rate isn't listed on their website, consider calling in and asking about it.

5. Drive-In Movie with Bonus Pleasure!

Remember drive-in movies? Turns out -- although they're harder to find now -- they're still around! Relive some of the fun of drive-in movies with an adult twist: pleasurable sex toys! With all of the new technology on the market, hands-free sex toys are getting easier to find - and more affordable. A pair of Hott Love Extreme Rechargeable Vibrating Panties from Spencer's, for example, runs you under $70 and features 10 (10!) different vibrating speeds.

Hott Love Extreme Rechargeable Vibrating Panties. Available exclusively at Spencer's.Hott Love Extreme Rechargeable Vibrating Panties. Available Exclusively at Spencer's.

Simply pack your Hott Love Extreme Rechargeable Vibrating Panties in your car and enjoy the fun of getting hot and bothered at a "movie theater" while no one else is the wiser!

Make sure to watch the facial expressions of the person wearing the panties, though -- especially if it's a packed evening at the theater tonight!

(If you don't have a drive-in theater around, you might need to get a bit more creative. Consider using your cell phone or tablet to "watch" a movie in your car while parked somewhere. You may not be able to order warm snacks, but you can still get the fun of seeing a movie inside the privacy of your car!)

READ: The 7 Best Car Sex Positions to Get Your Motors' Revving.

6. Dinner and a Vibrator!

Let's make those Hott Love Extreme Rechargeable Vibrating Panties pull double duty this time around. After you have an amazing time on your drive-in theater date, you're going to explore the remote controlled vibrator, again, in the privacy of your home.

One person is going to be the designated "cook" for the evening, and they're going to prepare a wonderful, fabulous meal for their partner (or share the duties. It's your date; do with it what makes you happy!)

The fun twist? The "non-cooking" partner is going to be holding the remote to the remote-controlled vibrator that the cook is wearing.

While avoiding any obviously dangerous moments (like removing items from the oven or handling a knife), the non-cooking partner can "buzz" the cook at a moment's notice. This can be when they need a refill of their drink -- or even just to watch them squirm while trying to fetch ingredients. It's all about the playful back-and-forth on an activity you both have probably done hundreds of times.

7. Get Creative with Sex Toy Kits

Do you have a sex toy kit sitting around your house? Or maybe you've never taken the time to get one? If so, now is the time! Exploring an entire kit can be a fun way to spend a date night evening.

See, manufacturers craft sex toy kits with a specific "scene" or "purpose" in mind. For example, the Kinky Adventures Sex Toy Kit from Spencer's is a beginner-friendly introduction to a bit of impact play and kink with multiple spanking toys and activity cards that give you instructions on how to use the kit.

Kinky Adventures Sex Toy Kit. Available Exclusively at Spencer's.Kinky Adventures Sex Toy Kit. Available Exclusively at Spencer's.

Exploring your brand-new (or new-to-you) sex toy kit can be a phenomenal date idea in and of itself!

If you've left a previously-bought kit in the back of the closet, though, consider taking it out and revitalizing it with a bit of creativity! What are all of the fun ways you can use it? Do those nipple clamps actually hang tingling little bells from your partner's body? Does the flogger double as a tickling toy or an erotic sensation play toy? Do the included "satin restraints" actually double as a very functional blindfold?

Looking at your previous kits in a brand new light can be a fun way to milk more use out of them. You might also find that your kinks or skills have changed since you originally bought the kit -- and now you have brand-new ideas to go along with these items!

Just set the kit out on the bed and see where your imagination takes you. Touch the items. Drag them along your partner's skin. See how they feel to handle. I think you'll be surprised where your brain takes you.

READ: How to Strengthen Your Erotic Imagination.

8. Head to the Dollar Store

Your local dollar store can be an amazing treasure trove of creative ideas -- especially if you want to get kinky. Nothing breaks the bank, and you can spend the entire visit thinking about all of the fun opportunities each item presents.

So, the next time you have the mental energy for a sexy date night, head to your local dollar store. Try to pick up items that have potential kink or sexual uses. For example, a spatula could be used for spanking, while a baggy winter hat could be pulled over the eyes as a blindfold.

READ: Pervertables: The Ultimate Guide to Using Household Items as Sex Toys.

If you prefer hilarious options, consider trying to make the "sexiest" outfit possible to have sex in -- and challenge each other to see who can resist laughing the longest. For example, a dollar store strainer could make a perfect hat, and a lime green hair scrunchie could become a cock ring.

Either way, when you get home with your loot, challenge yourselves to try it out and see if all of your creative ideas work out as swimmingly in real life as they did in your head.

9. Plan New Date Nights

If you're excited by the potential of things to come, this sexy date night idea might be for you. Simply spend your date night evening planning future date nights!

READ: The Key to Good Sex Isn’t Spontaneity - It’s Proper Planning.

Settle in with a delicious meal (takeout or homemade, it's all up to you!), and a piece of paper and a pen. Now, simply snuggle up with one another and talk about all of the cool things you want to do together. This can be as simple as visiting a specific restaurant or something more abstract like learning to cook a specific dish. Especially if the suggestions get a bit spicy, you might find yourself listing things like "Car sex at a national park," too. Feel free to let your minds wander and have a great time thinking about the "what if"s. You can always trim down the list later!

When you both are done with the full list, go over your list again, and sort and remove them as needed. Remember: this is designed to be a list of potential date nights, so things that can be accomplished in a single evening are ideal. If you both have found that you've also made a "couple's bucket list," though, bravo! Feel free to keep that written in a different spot to make those dreams come to life.

When you have your final list, write the date ideas on slips of paper and toss them into a container.

Now, next time you're short on ideas for your sexy date night, you simply draw a piece of paper. It's a win-win all around!

How to Plan a Sexy Date Night

Once you have the general idea of what you want to do, you still have to plan the date. Here are some tips to ensure that date night planning goes as effortlessly as possible:

Write Down Everything You Need for the Date

Start by writing down everything you'll need for the date. I recommend making three columns:

  1. Owned.
  2. Needed.
  3. Mental.

Write down all the physical things you'll need for the date sorted by whether you "Own" them or whether you "Need" them. This will help you determine how much time you need to gather stuff around your house -- or find out how to buy it somewhere. Finally, don't forget about the "Mental" things you need too. What mental headspace do you and your partner need to be in for the date? Will it fit into a hectic Wednesday evening? Does it require you both feel calm and relaxed? This can help you figure out where it can fit in to have the biggest positive impact possible.

Schedule the Date

Now that you know what's required, what mental state you need, and how long it will take to prep for it, schedule your date night. Yes, schedule! Make sure to double-check with your partner about their mental state on your prospective date, too. You never know if they have a stressful work meeting that day -- or planned on cleaning out the garage.

Delegate Gathering Supplies

Yes, I know you're planning the sexy date night here, but please make sure some of the date-night labor is shared. Now that you have a nice, handy list, give your partner some of the tasks and let them take care of it. You're going to have a hard time relaxing into the date night if you're worried about the logistics of pulling it all together all on your own.

Store the Items Together

Planning for your date night gets a lot less stressful if all of the items are just set out and ready. Especially for objects you rarely touch -- or items you bought just for the date -- set out a small corner of the bedroom to make your pile. Not only is this a great reminder to get excited for your date, but it helps ensure everything is ready and stress-free when date night comes!

Schedule Childcare

Most date night ideas will benefit from being without distractions. If that's the case, make sure your childcare is scheduled ahead of time.

Enjoy Yourselves

When the night of your date comes, try to enjoy yourselves! Make rules, as needed, to ensure that happens. Are phones off-limits? Pictures only? Does it help you both view the date as a lasting experience if you write a love note to one another about it afterwards? Determine what works best for you and use it to your advantage to make your next date night as reconnecting as possible.

READ: 9 Ways to Super-Charge Your Sexual Connection.


Valentine's Day is the perfect time to get creative with the quality time you spend with your sexual and romantic partner(s). Luckily, refreshing your date night routine doesn't have to be rocket science -- with these date ideas and some supplies from Spencer's, you have everything you need to renew your focus on your intimate and romantic relationships.

Mistress Kay

Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.

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