8 More Awesome Sex Positions for Big, Beautiful Bodies
Sex Positions for Big, Beautiful Bodies shouldn't be hard to find...and they aren't with this handy guide!
Contrary to society’s bullshit model-thin standards, I yearn for a world where people of all sizes are celebrated for their bodies, sexuality, and pleasure. As a bigger bodied woman myself, I deserve pleasure. And if you’re a big, beautiful human, you do too.
Sure, it can be nerve-wracking for any body to get naked and sexual with a partner – and especially if size makes certain logistics tricky. Here’s the thing: Even if we’re soft, curvy, and our stomachs jiggle, our capacity for sexual desire and expression is valid. We don’t have to settle for mediocre sex; we may just need a bit more space and support to make adjustments.
“Research shows that relationships with deep emotional connection have the best sexual satisfaction,” says Dr. Brenda Wade, advisor to Online For Love.
“Variety is the spice of life, so be daring and explore new sex positions and new ways to connect, too.”
Remember, you’re a big, beautiful sexy human, and you deserve what you want, when you want it, and how you want it done. These sex positions may be loved by big beautiful bodies, but they’re by no means the only ones. Consider this a creative starting point for sexy time.
Experiment and try ALL THE THINGS. Sex is supposed to be fun and playful and worrying about how you look in a certain position will only distract you from sweet, sweet pleasure. Do what feels good, safe and accessible for you. Hopefully, this roundup of positions will help put you at ease and give you some fun new options to play with. Now, fellow BBBs, let’s get laid!
Read: 6 Sex Positions Made for Big, Beautiful Bodies
If the penetrating partner is the right height to enter the other partner while standing on the floor, the butterfly sex position can be an excellent position for bigger bodies. Angela Rosario, Sex Expert at TooTimid explains how it works: The receiving partner lies on their back on the bed, and the penetrating partner enters them while standing next to the bed. “This position provides good support for the receiving partner, especially, who can reduce pressure on their back and stomach by holding their legs straight,” she says.
This position may not be easily accessible to people with disabilities and/or who use mobility devices. If the penetrating partner has disabilities and uses a walker or a cane, this position could work for them. If the receiving partner has issues with chronic pain and positioning, this kinky position can be modified using pillows.
Some bigger folks think the missionary position, or strap-on/penis-haver-on-top position, is off the table because big bellies can get in the way. Searah Deysach, sex educator and owner of Early to Bed says a well-placed pillow or sex position wedge can really help. “With your hips angled up, gravity pulls some of the stomach away, making penetration easier than without the pillow,” says Deysach.
“Pillows or wedges are also a great tool for allowing access for oral sex while on your back,” Deysach recommends the Liberator Jaz, similar to the Dame Pillo or Liberator Wedge. Additionally, pillows and wedges can also serve as an accessibility tool for bigger folks with disabilities, or if their partners have disabilities. They can relieve pressure and ensure a comfy climax.
"Pap Smear" Missionary
Alice Queen, founder of Vanilla is the New Kink, really likes what she calls the ‘pap smear’ missionary position, think Toad Position, with supported legs. The basic gist? The receiving partner lies on their back, with a wedge under their bottom to lift their pelvic area up. “Just like a pap-smear, you need support for your knees so that they are effortlessly up,” says Queen. “You can use pillows, folded blankets, cushions, etc.” Queen loves this position so much that she invested in a pair of small cube-shaped ottomans solely for the purpose.
This position may be difficult if the receiving partner has trouble opening their legs as a result of disabilities. It can be wonderful for both partners to explore massaging these areas beforehand to reduce spasticity.
Seated sex can be especially beneficial for big, beautiful receivers. In the perch position, Rosario explains, the penetrating partner sits in a chair (preferably on flooring that won’t slip). The receiving partner then straddles them, either facing toward them or away. “Facing away may be more comfortable for people with big bodies,” says Rosario. “Position the chair next to a surface that can be used to stabilize the receiving partner can be helpful for added support. This position is highly supported, which can be more comfortable for big, beautiful couples.”
Seated sex can also be extremely accessible if the penetrative partner is a wheelchair or mobility device user. Should they already use a wheelchair, this position can be achieved quite easily. If the receiving partner can walk, they can sit on the penetrative partner’s wheelchair or mobility device, and that way both partners can participate in sexy, seated fun.
Read: Big Love: Sex on the Plus Side
Cowgirl (or Rider) Position
If you have a bigger body, getting on top of your lover can feel intimidating. The cowgirl position can be a great choice, given the right circumstances. “If you can kneel on top of your partner, you can control the depth and how much weight is on your lover,” says Deysach. It can also be a time to bring in a chair, as in the pitcher's mound position. “Have your lover sit and straddle them. You can use the back of the chair for a handle, and you can put most of your weight on the floor.” Deysach encourages bigger bodies not to worry about how much weight their partner can tolerate.
“Many of us bigger folk think that no one could possibly handle our weight, but in reality, your lover may be more comfortable with you being on top of them than you think.” To be sure, she says to check in with your partner before you decide for yourself that you are too big for some position.
In the reverse rider (or cowgirl) position, the receiving partner straddles and faces away from the penetrating partner. For bigger bodies, the plus side of this position is that the receiving partner can control the depth, pace, and angle of penetration, says Rosario.