Sex positions

10 Hot Sex Positions That Are Better With a Spreader Bar

Published: JANUARY 18, 2024 | Updated: APRIL 29, 2024
Spreader bars are simple, sexy and can make sex better than ever. These steamy positions are BOUND to get your motor revving.

Have you seen a spreader bar? It's exactly what it sounds like: a metal bar that goes between limbs to "spread" them apart. This bondage tool either has cuffs built-in or attachment points where you can clip in your own restraints. Not only does it spread the limbs apart, though, the bar stays between the limbs - which means that the limbs can't be closed once the spreader bar is inserted.


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Spreader bars are most commonly attached to the ankles - to spread the legs apart - but they can be used on the wrists or in other creative ways as well!

I'm sure you can already see the erotic potential for spreader bars. Not only do they add feelings of bondage and vulnerability for the person wearing the spreader bar, but they also leave various areas "open for access" - like that area between the thighs where most people like to play.

Want to learn how to play with a spreader bar? Here are some super hot sex positions to try.


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Read: The Best Sex Positions for Rough Sex

Spreader Bar Sex Positions

So, let's get into the hot stuff you came here for - all of the erotic ways you can use a spreader bar in the bedroom.

The Basic Y Position

basic Y sex position with spreader bar

Almost everyone will recognize the Basic Y position as the first position they tried with their spreader bar. It's easy, it's comfortable, and it's a great way to really see what wearing a spreader bar feels like.

For a lot of people, this spreader bar sex position is also really great for self bondage. The Basic Y position is also an easy way to put on the spreader bar. From there, you can take things anywhere you want to!


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The Standing Bar Position

Standing Spreader Bar Sex Position

Nobody says all of your spreader bar play has to take place while the person is lying down! Instead, the Standing Bar Position uses the spreader bar to spread the bound person's ankles wide. With an adjustable spreader bar, you can vary the "spread" of the person's ankles, but if you have a spreader bar without adjustments, ensure that your partner's legs can spread as wide as the length of the bar.

Make sure that you've accounted for any balance loss, though, especially if you're going to do anything to the bound person that might jostle their body around (like a spanking!) Letting the person lean forward to grip a sturdy object (like a countertop) to keep steady can help prevent any accidental falls.

Alternatively, if you're really into the look of your bound partner standing tall in their spreader bar bondage, consider doing this scene next to the bed with the activity's momentum in mind, where they can fall onto the soft, fluffy surface if something causes your captive to lose their balance.


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This position can also be great for solo play as long as you keep those safety suggestions in mind. There can just be something really hot about masturbating in such a vulnerable position.

Try it with the Sportsheets Expandable Spreader Bar and Cuff Set

Carnal Clutch Position

Carnal Clutch sex position. The receiving partner is laying flat on a surface while their ankles are in the air. The Liberator Talea's bondage cuffs are wrapped around the receiver's ankles while the penetrating partner holds the Talea up in the air. Their hips are pressed up against one another.

Easily mix intercourse with bondage with the Carnal Clutch position. By using a spreader bar that's covered with a soft, huggable layer (the Talea!), the penetrating partner can comfortably pull the spreader bar to their chest, supporting the weight of the receiver's legs. It's part bondage position, part sex position and part sex sling!


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Lifting the legs in the air like this can make it much, much easier to hit the g-spot or p-spot. Further elevating the hips with a Liberator Wedge or other sex furniture shape could increase that spot's exposure even more.

Most couples will want to try this with the receiving partner lying on the edge of an elevated, sturdy surface so the penetrating partner can stand. However, if the angles match up for you, this could also be done on a bed while the penetrating partner is kneeling.

Shown with: Liberator Talea soft spreader bar


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Behind-the-Back Position

Behind the Back Spreader Bar Sex Position

Spreader bars don't just need to be used for ankles; in fact, a spreader bar can work great when used on the wrists as well. With the behind-the-back position, the wrists are held in a similar position, as found in the "Server's Hand" rope bondage position - without any rope! Run the spreader bar behind the person's back, have the person place their wrists next to their shoulders, and attach the cuffs to the wrists. This will hold the hands up by the shoulders - and prohibit the bound person from putting their hands down.

Read: How to Tie Bondage Knots: A Guide for Beginners

Especially for people with breasts, this position can feel very vulnerable. By pulling the wrists near the shoulders, they will consequently push their chest forward. With the bar's placement on the back, this spreader bar prohibits almost all movement, which can feel very pleasurable for those who love this type of restriction.

In rope bondage, this position gets its name ("Server's Hand") from how closely this resembles the look of a tray kept upon the shoulder during food service. Mixing some service submission with this Behind-the-Back Spreader Bar position can be a fun way to play with the position.

Keep in mind that this will be a limited time spreader bar position. Think about how quickly you get "pins and needles" sensations when your arms are pointed towards the sky. That's about how long you have to enjoy what you're wanting to do before doing any repositioning.

Try it with the Bound to You Spreader Bar

The Vertical X Position

Vertical X Bondage sex position. A person is kneeling. Their wrists, wrapped in bondage cuffs, are raised in the sky. The two cuffs are attached to a spreader bar which is chained to the ceiling above them.

There's something about seeing a person's wrists helplessly bound above their head that does something to a lot of us. The Vertical X Position takes advantage of that.

By suspending the spreader bar from any sturdy overhead point, you instantly have a simple way to restrain the wrists above the head. This can feel very vulnerable, since it leaves the entire body on display with no way to cover up. Since limbs are mostly out of the way, almost all sex activities can be done during the Vertical X Position, which is part of why it has such a large following in kink communities.

Like other above-the-head positions, make sure you know that the Vertical X Position has a limited lifespan. Most people's arms will get that pins and needles feeling from lack of blood flow from the positioning of the wrists.

Also ensure that your spreader bar is designed to support weight before using it for a weight-bearing spreader bar position like this! If the hook in the ceiling is rated for a potted plant and you put a human being on it, it's likely to come down. Ensure that any bondage point you use is correctly installed. If you plan on doing bondage like this often, consider hiring a professional. (You can tell them you want to install one of those floating egg chairs!)

Try it with the Sportsheets Expandable Spreader Bar and Cuff Set

Subservient Smooching Position

Subservient Smooching sex position. Two people are kneeling, facing one another. One person is wearing a Liberator Bastion stocks around their neck and wrists. A leash is attached to the front of the stocks, and the other partner is holding the leash, pulling the bound person in for a kiss.

While the Subservient Smooching position is shown with a portable stocks instead of a spreader bar, the same premise can be accomplished with a spreader bar - and lead to some ultra-hot make-out potential! Simply place a spreader bar in front of (or behind, depending on your preference!) your captive's head, and fasten their wrist cuffs to it!

With their wrists bound to the bar and the rest of their body open for play, there's a lot of potential pleasure on the table! You'll probably find that the chest and the face will be easiest to access, though, without throwing the bound partner off-balance. That's why this position works seamlessly for making out, nipple clamps and breast play. (You could also throw a tickle scene in there, but we'd recommend lying down for that one!)

If your spreader bar has a bondage point in the middle, you can attach a leash, as shown, to "pull" your kneeling captive closer for more kisses anytime you'd like.

Shown with Liberator Bastion

Four Points, One Bar Position

Four Points Bondage Sex Position Spreader Bar

Some spreader bars have four bondage points built right into the bondage bar. This allows for four kinky restraints to be attached instead of the usual two, opening up more bondage possibilities. If you happen to own a specialized spreader bar that allows for this, you can easily achieve a hog-tie-like position with the Four Points, One Bar Position.

This position requires the bound person's flexibility to allow them to reach their wrists to the same plane that their ankles are on. For a lot of people, this may be a strain (at best) or just plain impossible. There's no reason you need to give up on the position, though! You can just add a separate spreader bar - one for the ankles, one for the wrists - and still enjoy the same position!

For those who can achieve them, hogtie positions (like this one!) are notorious for making it difficult to breathe. Make sure you both communicate often - and expect a limited lifespan for this position. You can easily unclip the ankles or wrists to quickly make it more comfortable so that play can continue.

Try it with the Sportsheets Bondage Bar

Leapfrog Bondage Position Leapfrog Bondage Position. Person in a doggy style position with wrists and ankles bound, gagged.

The Leapfrog bondage position is a simple way to modify the Four Points, One Bar position by having the bound person on their knees. The spreader bar is then cuffed around the ankles. Putting all of their weight on their knees, the bound person reaches their arms between their spread legs to put the wrists next to the spreader bar. The spreader bar can then be attached to the wrist cuffs, which leaves the person restrained in that position.

This spreader bar sex position is a popular favorite, mostly because it leaves everything on display. This can feel pretty vulnerable for the bound person. It also leaves the butt, vagina and penis easily available, which can make for easy intercourse or the use of some body safe sex toys. This bondage sex position is also more comfortable - and easier to stay in - than many other spreader bar bondage sex positions on this list, which means that everyone can take their time.

For those who may not have the flexibility to comfortably get their wrists all the way down to the bar, a separate pair of kinky restraints for the wrists to stay at chest level can easily stand-in. (Consider adding some Liberator sex furniture underneath the tummy to support some of the body weight and take pressure off the knees if the knees don't like this position.)

Since this position will put a lot of weight onto the bound person's sternum and face, I recommend using pillows or other position aids to ensure the person is comfortable and can easily breathe. While a mouth gag can be added to the position as shown in the illustration, I recommend giving it a try without the mouth gag first a few times to ensure the bound person can easily breathe and communicate any discomfort.

Try it with the Liberator Talea

Bent Over Bondage Position

Bent Over Bondage Position. Person standing, bent over with wrists bound to ankles.

Up for an added challenge? I'd easily say this is the toughest - and also most dangerous - sex position on this list. Not only does it require a serious amount of balance and flexibility, but it also removes the bound person's ability to catch themselves if they tip. It's basically yoga.

To do the Bent Over Bondage Position, have the bound person stand with their ankles spread apart. For the most sturdy starting point, an adjustable spreader bar will allow you to adjust the spreader bar to your partner's most comfortable, usual standing stance. Once the ankles are bound into the spreader bar, the person bends over to reach their wrists down so that they can be bound to the spreader bar as well.

If the bound person is unable to comfortably reach their wrists to their feet, you can easily bind the wrists together with cuffs - and use a bondage tether to attach it to the spreader bar.

This position can really bring out the feeling of helplessness in the bound partner. Not only will they need to stay focused on keeping their balance, but it's near impossible to move away or move the body away from any sort of touch or sensation. This can leave them feeling very exposed and very "at the mercy" of their lover. It leaves the majority of the genital area available for play as well.

As you might imagine, the biggest danger in this position is if the person falls. Since there is no way to brace themselves, the person can easily fall directly onto their head. To help prevent this, don't do this position with anyone who isn't extremely stable and leave any potential balance-destroyers like heels, sleepiness and alcohol entirely out of the equation.

To help make this position even more stable, you can have the person stand up against the bed. While they may need to bend their arms a bit to make this comfortable, depending on your bed's height, the person may be able to rest their upper chest and head onto the bed - which can provide something to lean against and prevent toppling.

If you want to modify this position for the most safety possible, skip the equipment entirely and use verbal bondage to command the bound person to keep their wrists next to the spreader bar. This provides an easy way for the person to catch themselves if they tip - but it also makes a great excuse to "punish" them if they get sloppy too (impact toys like riding crops can be a great prop that can offer a quick "punishment" if the captive moves).

Try it with the Sportsheets Bondage Bar

The Advanced X Position

Advanced X Sex Position

Have two spreader bars? We have an option for you!

Why stick to binding JUST the ankles or JUST the wrists if you can bind them both? Two spreader bars makes them instantly possible.

Have the bondage wearer get into the Basic Y position. After you attach a spreader bar for the ankles, add another one for the wrists. It's that simple! The bound person can then recline - or stay seated - for a lot of fun.

Try it with the Sportsheets Enchanted Spreader Bar and the Sportsheets Adjustable Spreader Bar

The Inverted X Position

Inverted X Spreader Bar Sex Position

Take that "Advanced X Position" and flip it upside down so the person is on their hands and knees. Not only does this leave the entire butt available, but it also grants easier access to everything fun between the thighs.

You may want to add some pillows or Liberator sex furniture to this one to help it be as comfortable as possible. Most people aren't used to being on their hands and knees with both wrists and ankles spread very far out. An adjustable spreader bar (on its lowest spread settings) can help reduce some of the strain, but this is not a position you should expect most people to be able to hold for long periods of time.

Try it with the Sportsheets Enchanted Spreader Bar and the Sportsheets Adjustable Spreader Bar

Spreader Bar Comparison

Not sure which spreader bar to get? We get it; the world of spreader bars can be a bit confusing. This easy-peasy chart will help you figure out which spreader bar is going to be the perfect fit for your next bondage sesh.

 Liberator TaleaSportsheets Enchanted Spreader BarSportsheets Adjustable Spreader BarSportsheets Expandable Spreader Bar and Cuff SetBound to You Spreader BarSportsheets Bondage BarSTRICT Lockable Spreader BarMaster Series Squat Impaler
Length30"13.5"28.5" to 37"29" to 37"20"24"16"27.5" to 35.25"
Adjustable?NoNoYesYesNoNoNoYes
Comes with Cuffs?If SelectedYesNoYesNoYesYesYes
Changeable Cuffs?YesNoYesYesYesNoNoYes

Basic Spreader Bar Safety

In the world of BDSM, using spreader bars while lying down is actually a low-risk type of bondage activity, especially if you're using a pre-made set that's been designed for sex. Even so, it's important to adhere to some basic safety guidelines.

Have an Escape Plan

Ensure you know how to easily get your partner out of the spreader bar in case of an emergency. Panic attacks, difficulty breathing, or just plain leg cramps can all be reasons that you want your partner out of their bondage in a hurry. Ensure that you know exactly how your spreader bar works - and how to get them out instantly - in case something goes sideways.

Decide on a Safeword

Discuss safewords with your partner before you begin. Since kink can regularly include role play and “I’m being forced into pleasure!” dynamics, safewords are odd, unrelated-to-sex words to signify that something is very wrong - and you aren't just role playing distress. While you might enjoy a “No, please don’t!” during your role lay (when you don’t actually want them to stop!), saying “yellow banana!” can clearly mean something is up.

If wearing a gag or otherwise impeding vocal communication is part of your fun, use a safe gesture (holding coins or a set of keys to drop or throw, for example) instead of a word.

Read: What makes a good safe word?

Establish Good Communication

Before you play, discuss safety with your partner and ensure you’re both on the same page. Having a plan means both partners are on the same page with clear communication. Even if you have a safe word, you should both check in with one another regularly to ensure you’re doing great.

Don't Push Too Far

Particularly with spreader bars, you'll want to pay attention to the width between the person's limbs. In some cases, if you've stretched the person's limbs to their absolute limit, their limb will start to press into the bar. Consider an adjustable spreader bar (if that's an option) or keep position length shorter.

Consider How You'll Play

If the person wearing the spreader bar is to be walking, unique safety concerns pop up. Most notably, ensure that you have a plan in case of falls. While a person walking around to serve your coffee with their hands bound in a spreader bar might sound hot, it also presents a unique challenge: if they fall, they have no way to brace themselves or protect themselves. Make sure you plan ahead for this and do your very best to minimize this risk.

Don't forget about fatigue as well. Especially if this spreader bar is being worn for more than sex, it's possible for limbs to get tired or start to fall asleep. Keep this in mind, keep open communication with your partner, and be open and willing to change positions as necessary to ensure you're both fully present.

Read: 5 Tips for Practicing Intentional Aftercare

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Mistress Kay

Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.

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