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How should I prepare myself for anal sex?

Ken Melvoin-Berg
Profile Picture of Ken Melvoin-Berg

Ken Melvoin-Berg is a Chicago based freelance writer, author, professional pervert, TV producer, BDSM/sex educator, adult industry consultant, and male sex toy advocate. He is also the Consulting Producer/Sharon Osbourne of Showtime’s “Sex with Sunny Megatron.”

Ken is an “edutainer” armed with knowledge of all things sexual, a humorous lecturing style, and a professional background in medicine/biology. He has been writing and lecturing on these subjects since 1997. Ken is known for his amazing facial hair and tattoos. He also loves his family, Aquaman, his amazing pug, Nathan, and the USA.

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I'm interested in trying anal sex with my partner, but I don't know much about it. How should I prepare myself for anal sex?


How to prepare for anal sex is actually a question that I am asked on a regular basis. The short answer: it depends. Here are a few of the questions that you may want to consider before prepping for back door action:

  • What have you eaten in the last 24 hours?
  • What size anus do you have?
  • Do you suffer from hemorrhoids or anal fissures?
  • Have you had anal sex recently?
  • Are you psychologically ready for the act itself?

Don't eat food like lots of prunes because they soften your poo. Instead, eat things with lots of fiber. You want the bowel movement to be hard instead of soft. Your anus is very elastic and can stretch from use. So, if you have a larger anus that can comfortably fit a cock, you don't need to start small. If you have any medical issues that leave you unable to have back door action temporarily, like hemorrhoids or fissures, simply wait for them to calm down. Your state of mind is critical for relaxation. Don't push yourself if not in the mood.

Try Drinking Coffee
Try drinking coffee the morning of the big day. There's a good reason that. There are coffee mugs that say, "Coffee makes me poop." Next, if you have bullets in the chamber, poop them out before anal. A good bowel movement and a cleaning with simple soap and water is an easy way to prep.

Should I Use an Enema?
To enema or not to enema, that is the question. If the act of pooping and cleaning up the exterior isn't enough for you, an enema may be the next way to go. Buy a disposable enema kit from any pharmacy. Also, use plain warm water. You don't need to use a cleansing solution.

Relaxation Is Key
Relaxation is the key element needed to prepare for anal sex. Relax both your mind and your body. Use methods like massage, touch, and lots of foreplay. Once relaxed it's time for lube. Lube is a personal preference. I prefer silicone lube for anal sex. It's more slippery, needs less reapplication, is hypoallergenic, and safe to use with condoms. Feel free to use water based (thicker is better), oil based like petroleum jelly (you can't use condoms with this), or a hybrid silicone/water lube.

Getting Started With Anal Sex
Start by either using a small butt plug, anal beads, or even a finger. Gradually use larger toys or add more fingers until the ass is relaxed and ready for larger toys or penile penetration. It is important to get as turned on as possible. The hornier you are, the more enjoyable the anal sex will be.

Now that you are clean, relaxed, horny, and lubed you are fully prepared for anal sex. Have a great time, stay sex positive, and have great anal sex!

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