Sex Blogger of the Month: Crista Anne

As part of our Sex Blogger Directory project we profile a sex blogger each and every month. This month, we're giving the floor to Crista Anne, the rainbow loving "progressive pleasurist" behind CristaAnne.com. We love her blog because it's personal, relatable and comes in an eye-pleasing rainbow color palette. Check out how Crista Anne answered Kinkly's 10 Blogger of the Month questions.

Kinkly: Give us three words that describe your blog.

Crista Anne: Rainbow colored revolutionary


Kinkly: What inspired you to start the blog?

Crista Anne: This is a long answer! I've been blogging since before the term blog was invented. Starting with angelfire sites, then a long stint writing on Live Journal. Sharing my life, my journey, my fluctuating sexuality is what I do. It's my comfort, it's how I process, it's how I work towards changing the world in my own way. I've bounced around a bit as far as name and branding is concerned. There was also a long hiatus that I took because of fears from harassment and how it would affect my children/custody situations. CristaAnne I started because above all else, I'm a sexuality writer. This is me. My real name, my real voice. #OrgasmQuest, of course, has been the big focus on my site, but I cover a wide range of topics relating to what I am passionate about. This site is a glimpse into my world, a way for me to express my truth and take joy from the conversations that my words inspire.

Kinkly: What’s behind the name?

Crista Anne: Crista Anne is my real name. My last name fluctuates, so I've opted to be known professionally by my first and middle names. Being out here as myself is both freeing and terrifying.

Kinkly: Who’s your target reader?

Crista Anne: I delight in the wide range of readers I have. I put forth a lot of effort to make sure I have quality content for all of them. My sexuality collaborators and peers, other people who are suffering through mental illness and anorgasmia. Folks who love sex toys. Also, because I am a Mother, I get a good deal of parents reading my blog. I'm about to make more of a push for pieces that relate to sex-positive parenting. I welcome anyone and everyone to my site.

Kinkly: What’s unique about your blog?

Crista Anne: Many things, but above all else, my blog is actually me. Actually my life. My truth and my honesty. I'm open and in many cases very vulnerable. There is no bullshit, no hiding. Mostly my raw, naked truth. I think that is one of the many reasons my words resonate with so many people.

Kinkly: What is the topic you find yourself covering most often and why?

Crista Anne: Currently most of my writing revolves around #OrgasmQuest, a project I started in December that has gone viral over recent months. After a lifetime of being a highly orgasmic person, I started an antidepressant that really, actually works for me. I enjoy life for the first time in my 32 years. I'm happy to get up in the morning because I actually look forward to my day. The drawback to this is that I am now, like millions of other people, anorgasmic. Meaning that I cannot orgasm, even with "proper" stimulation. So I began blogging and tweeting under the #OrgasmQuest hashtag my journey fighting back. Switching medications isn't an option for me - for a number of reasons. I'm determined to get my pleasure back, and it's working slowly. Talking about the intersection of mental illness and sexuality has become a passion, as is busting stigmas regarding Motherhood and empowered sexuality. I love the work I am doing now. It's resonating with people around the world. I'm incredibly proud.

Kinkly: What was your most popular post ever? Why do you think it drew so many readers?

Crista Anne: My most popular post is Crista and her #OrgasmQuest, which is the kick off post to the #OrgasmQuest project. It drew so many readers because open dialogue about sexual side effects from medication, experiencing anorgasmia, is a very common experience, yet shame and stigma keeps people from talking about it. I am more than happy to talk about it, to share my experiences. Tell people what works and what doesn't for me. I am in no way a doctor or an expert in anything beyond my own body, but just beginning the conversation has been a huge step.

Kinkly: What’s the best thing about writing a sex blog?

Crista Anne: I love having a space where I can be openly a sexually empowered woman. Sexually empowered Mother. While I do not write to titillate, I enjoy being able to speak about sex in accessible language. Praise the power of masturbation and show off the beauty that is quality sex toys.

Kinkly: What’s the worst thing about it?

Crista Anne: The harassment and threats. Again, this is all me. My real name. My face. I'm a queer poly woman, so I get death and corrective rape threats all the time. Or unsolicited dick pictures, which utterly enrage me. Just because I'm openly sexual is not an "invitation" to sexually harass me or threaten me. This is a huge problem in our current Internet culture and it is another thing that I am pushing back on. This behavior is unacceptable and it is on all of us to start correcting it.

Kinkly: OK, now for the good stuff: Give us your best tip for great sex.

Crista Anne: Quality communication. That isn't the sexiest sex tip out there, but work on quality communication within your relationships. Establish boundaries and comfort levels, then check in when needed to verify that everyone is getting their needs met. I've found that when communication is valued outside the sexual encounters, communication regarding sexual needs becomes so much easier. Listening to your partner on what they need, what they like, and going from there? That's how I've achieved the best sex of my life, orgasmic or not.