Kinkly: What's unique about your blog?
Malin James: Oh, wow. I’m not sure…I suppose the fact that my content is equal parts fiction and nonfiction is something. I also take a kind of an introspective slant on things. Even a general topic, like jealousy and the ethics of non-monogamy, tends to get a close look from a more personal angle. As much as I try to write from a place of consideration and perspective, I’m very present in my posts.
Kinkly: What is the topic you find yourself covering most often and why?
Malin James: Outside erotica, which makes up 50% of my blog, I’d say that the rest is split between non-monogamy and personal essays on everything from the awesomeness of going down on someone to recovering from abusive relationships.
Kinkly: What was your most popular post ever? Why do you think it drew so many readers?
Malin James: For fiction it has to be “Open Me.” I wrote it three years ago and it still gets daily hits. On the nonfiction side, “The Joy of Sucking Cock” is, hands down, the big winner. I have a feeling the title helps that one along.
Kinkly: What's the best thing about writing a sex blog?
Malin James: The best thing is definitely that there are no boundaries on what I can write about. For centuries, sex, religion and politics have been the three big, forbidden topics in our culture. The fact that I can write openly and broadly about one of them without having to think about censorship or propriety is a massively freeing thing.
Kinkly: What's the worst thing about it?
Malin James: I put myself on the page a lot in my posts, but even with that, I tend to be a really private person. Protecting my privacy and maintaining healthy boundaries is kind of exhausting, but necessary, at least for me.
Kinkly: OK, now for the good stuff. Give us your best tip for great sex.
Malin James: It sounds simple, but honesty. Be honest with yourself and with your partner(s) about everything from what your fantasies and experiences, to what scares or excites you. Honesty, especially with yourself, helps counteract all sort of things from shame to misunderstanding. That’s why, in my experience, it’s the foundation for amazing sex, regardless of what kind of sex you have.