The “L” in LGBTQIA+ is quite possibly the most fetishized, fantasized niche in the entire adults-only market. The allure and mystery surrounding the magical, curious activity that is lesbian sex has been the tokenized subject of countless porn videos, sex toy advertisements, and mainstream cinema and art alike.

It is ever the more annoyingly amusing, then, that scarcely anyone thinks actual, real-life lesbian couples deserve the juicy sex lives depicted on screens and in photographs for the consumption of straight audiences.

Though the sex toy industry is rapidly expanding to encompass all sexual identities, the options for lesbians are still sorely lacking. Woman and queer-owned sex toy companies exist, but they're so few in number – and sadly, often small and difficult to find.

However, all is certainly not lost, thanks to a 10-year old pleasure products brand that's been successful enough to branch out. When lesbians want a retail experience with more than a few niche toys, they go to Wet for Her.

Founded by Alice Derock in 2009, Wet for Her is currently the only multi-product manufacturer and retailer catering solely to lesbians and queer women. Derock opened her online retailer with the TWO Finger Extender, a penetrative sex toy shaped like a pair of smooth, elongated fingers for more extensive, less penis-like internal play.

SEX TOY FINGER EXTENDER PURPLE

Like the rest of us inclusive sex toy enthusiasts, Derock was disappointed when she couldn't find any pleasure products that fit her and her girlfriend's desires. She's since built out the Wet for Her brand to include both proprietary creations under the WFH name – like the RockHer mini scissoring vibrator – and popular options from other queer-owned (or at least LGBTQIA-friendly) companies, like SpareParts and POP! Dildo/The Semenette.

As it stands, it seems the market for lesbian sex toys is as small as the often joked-about lesbian dating pool. You can only search for the right match (or vibrator) across so many websites before running into the same people (or brands) over and over again.

Inside jokes aside, Alice Derock thinks this stereotype is largely to blame for the pleasure industry's lack of toys for gay women.

“People wrongly assume that there isn’t a market for lesbian sex toys or that the market isn’t big enough to pursue. Maybe companies think that the existing female products on the market will cater for all women,” muses Derock. “But we all know sex is personal and not one size fits all. Just because a market isn’t deemed “big enough” doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be catered for, especially when it comes to sexual well-being.”

Sex Toys Aren't One Size Fits All

While lesbian couples can certainly still use any old bullet vibrator, why would they want to – and why should they have to? Gay and queer sex is pretty much nothing like the mainstream world imagines.

For those that weren't aware, many early sex toy companies were birthed from porn production businesses – the kind that definitely did not produce what we now call ethical or queer porn. Is it really any wonder these folks were clueless about lesbian women's needs?

“In the early days, it was not really understood that our community needed its own space, instead of being an afterthought additional category to existing mainstream stores; a category that either featured products for heterosexual women or very limited products for lesbians,” says Derock. “We needed and deserved a space for us.”

If you've never slept with someone of the same gender or someone who identifies as queer, you've got to at least consult with a few LGBTQIA+ folks when making queer toys. It's literally the bare minimum. Somehow most of the straight, male CEOs missed this memo – go figure! - when the sex toy industry was in its' infancy a few decades ago.

“Back then as a customer, it felt like the market believed that the sex toys that were designed for heterosexual women would be sufficient for the lesbian and queer market, too,” recalls Derock. “It was like all women, whatever their sexuality, would be satisfied with the same products. As we all know, this is not the case!”

How Lesbian Specific Sex Toys Differ

With every Wet for Her product design, Derock has since poured all of her rightful angst into subtle details that only a card-carrying lesbian would understand. The Wet For Her brand means vulvas everywhere can rest assured that their toys are, as Derock's slogan proclaims, “by women for women.”

“We at Wet For Her know our market, we understand lesbian sex and we understand what lesbians want from a toy,” says Derock. “With our Wet For Her designed toys, we include extra features specifically with lesbians in mind and that you won’t find in straight sex toys. Customers know that the products have been designed by someone who understands lesbian sex and what lesbian couples look for in a product.”

While Derock's analysis feels a little disheartening and discouraging, especially for an industry focused so strongly on inclusion and diversity, she still thinks we've done pretty damn well for ourselves.

“There are fantastic female pleasure products on the market,” Derock points out. “Design has come a long way!”

Derock's own designs are largely responsible for this small but mighty lesbian toy revolution. She's translated her own sexual experiences into prime examples of superior lesbian toys like the Wet For Her Fusion Strap-On Dildo. Derock created this vibrating work of art to pair with the BumpHer, a silicone cushion that, when placed at the base of a dildo, gives the wearer clitoral and vulva stimulation.

Why Lesbian Specific Sex Toys Matter

While a sex toy may seem trivial to your average, sexually awakened straight couple, lesbian pleasure devices intrinsically arrive with a message: I see and understand you, and your pleasure matters.

Lesbian sex toys empower the entire person, not just their bedroom activities.

“I wanted our community to be at the forefront and to have our sexual needs to be understood and catered for,” concludes Derock. “Since our launch, we have been going strong and continue to grow, showing that there is a need for a specific sexual space for lesbian and queer women. Sexual taste and preference is individualist and unique. We cannot expect one product will do the job for everyone!”

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