What if we told you that better sex was possible in just 14 days’ time? Actually, it is – if you’re willing to put in the time and effort. You’re up for it, right? After all, a big part of keeping your sex life hot and healthy has to do with learning more about yourself, learning more about your partner and just making an effort. Valentine’s day is on the way this month. So, as a gift to your partner – and yourself – try one of these challenges every day for 14 days. Or, pick and choose the ones that work for you!
Day 1: Discover What You’re Into
The first step to better sex? Figuring out what “better” means to you. So, do a little soul-searching. What are you into? What’s missing from your sex life? What’s on your sexual bucket list? Start making a list of things you’d like to try or have some interest in. You'll be feeling sexier in no time!
Learn more: 7 Tips to Getting the Sex Life You Always Wanted
Day 2: Learn About Your Partner
Once you’ve given some thought to what you might be into, it’s time to check in with your partner. Where are their fantasies steering them? What new things are they interested in trying? If your lists overlap, you can get busy trying some new things. But even if they don’t, you can probably figure out ways to incorporate some new fantasies into your play. Plus, getting to know your partner better can be super hot and intimate all by itself.
Day 3: Use Lube
This one is so simple and foolproof it isn’t much of a challenge but (trust us) it can work wonders for your sex life. Whether you’re having penetrative sex, using your hands or playing with toys, lubricant makes everything feel better. It reduces irritation, helps make play last longer and just feels so sexy! Break out the lube today. You’ll never go back!
Day 4: Start Doing Those Kegels
Kegels aren’t just for women – they’re for everyone. If you aren’t doing them on the regular, now’s the time to start. The Kegel muscles are pelvic floor muscles that contract rhythmically during orgasm. If they are stronger, your orgasms will be too. Try three sets of 10 contractions a day. You could see results in as little as two weeks!
Learn more: For Better Orgasms, Flex This Muscle
Day 5: Try a New Sex Position
If sex is starting to feel same-old, same-old, a new sex position can totally change your perspective (literally!). Try something brand new, or discover a new twist on a position you already love. Easy-peasy. And oh-so-sexy.
Learn more: Kinkly Sex Position Playlist
Day 6: Do It Somewhere Different
Just as a new sex position can spice things up, so can having sex in a new place. That could mean taking your next session to a different room in the house or, if you’re more adventurous, to somewhere semi-public. The possibilities are endless, so determine what’s sexy to you and your partner and go for it!
Day 7: Add Some Erotic Content
Sometimes in order to feel sexy, we need to think sexy. One of the best ways to get into the mindset is with a little erotic content. Try watching pornography, watching it with your partner or tucking into a steamy erotic read. Better sex is sure to follow.
Learn more: Kinkly’s Archive of Erotic Stories and Excerpts
Day 8: Try a Little Public Play
If you’re shy, public displays of affection (or eroticism!) may not be for you. But what if you could get your kicks while remaining entirely discreet? Well, you can. In fact, you can get your kink on in public in ways that’ll leave no else the wiser. Whether you wear some sexy lingerie and whisper it to your partner, caress them covertly, or wear a sex toy under your clothes and hand your partner the remote, chances are you’ll be tearing each other’s clothes off before you even make it home.
Day 9: Give Each Other Massages
Quickies are great (and necessary!) but sometimes it pays to take the time to really lavish some sensual attention on your partner’s body. A sensual massage is a great way to do that. Get some sexy massage oil and start rubbing. It only gets better from here.
Day 10: Experience Sensation Play
Sex is all about sensation, so changing it or heightening it can totally alter the experience – in a good way! If you’re into soft sensations, try a feather tickler, some soft wrist ties or a blindfold. If you’re looking for something more extreme, try spanking, bondage or even pain play.
Learn more: The Ultimate Guide to Sensation Play
Day 11: Consider Prostate Play
Anal play is on many people’s bucket lists, but it ranks especially high for people with prostates. The prostate, after all, is considered the male G-spot, and stimulating it can produce some of the most intense full-body orgasms imaginable. Not sure where to start? A prostate massager can make finding and pleasing this spot easy, whether it’s a pleasure enjoyed alone or with a partner.
Day 12: Watch Each Other Masturbate
If you’ve never tried this, it might seem counterintuitive, but playing with yourself might just be the most intimate thing you ever do with a partner. Not only do you each get the super-hot visual of the other doing their thing, but you also get to learn each other’s secret moves!
Learn more: Masturbation Each Day Keeps the Doctor Away
Day 13: Try a New Sex Toy
So far, this challenge has been all about trying new things. Well, here's one more: Try a new sex toy. Or, if you’ve never used a sex toy, perhaps it’s time to give it a try! There are lots of ways to enjoy your body (and orgasms!), but sex toys are purpose-built to do the job – and do it well. Why not make them part of your sexual exploration this month?
Learn more: 10 Steps to Choosing a Vibrator
Day 14: Come Again
Sex is about more than orgasms – a lot more. That said, becoming more orgasmic is a skill that you can cultivate over time. If this is an idea you’re into, consider pushing your limits a little. If you rarely make time for masturbation and orgasm, consider working more self-love into your schedule. If you usually only come once with your partner, consider going for a second round. Whatever you choose, give sex and sexual pleasure a place of priority in your life. Do that and good things are bound to, well ... come.
Learn more: 3 Simple Ways to Have Bigger, Stronger Orgasms