Erotic Surrender

Updated: FEBRUARY 3, 2020

Erotic surrender is a submission to erotic sensations and experiences. It is the opposite of spectatoring, a term coined by Masters and Johnson which describes experiencing erotic sensations as if you are a third-party looking in, rather than completely giving in to them.

Erotic surrender is sometimes called functional surrender.

More About Erotic Surrender

Erotic surrender requires living in the moment and truly experiencing all the sensations associated with sex. It should not be confused with being a selfish lover; people who erotically surrender focus on both their own sensations and those of their partners. A failure to erotically surrender may make it more difficult to reach orgasm.

Men typically find it harder to erotically surrender, but women are increasingly struggling to do this to. Body hang-ups, which cause women to worry about how their stomach looks when in a particular position for example, are a key culprit in this growing trend. Other concerns such as stresses at work and daily chores may also interfere with an individual’s ability to erotically surrender. A history of sexual abuse may also cause people to struggle to erotically surrender.

Meditation may help people erotically surrender and be more present during sex. Using a blindfold, which effectively blocks out visual stimuli and heightens the senses of touch, taste, and smell, can also help someone erotically surrender.


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