Updated: NOVEMBER 3, 2023
Reviewed by Dr. Laura McGuire
on September 21, 2021

A cuckqueen, or female cuckold, is a woman who is aroused by her partner engaging in sexual activity with another partner. The term is normally used to describe a heterosexual or bisexual woman married to a man. However, a cuckqueen may be a lesbian or unmarried in a relationship with someone who sleeps with others.

Cuckqueen Term Origins

The term “cuckqueen” comes from the term “cuckold,” which traditionally means a man whose wife is adulterous. In this instance, however, the meaning varies slightly (as it does in some modern interpretations of cuckold) because the partner in question is not being deceived and is, in fact, complicit in the activity. Scientists also use the term cuckqueen to describe female animals that raise babies that are not their genetic offspring as their own.

Cuckqueen is sometimes spelled cuckquean, which is the traditional spelling, dating back to the mid-16th century. Cuckqueen is a more modern alternative that features the term “queen,” denoting a powerful woman. The contemporary spelling reflects the power a cuckqueen maintains in the relationship.

The female cuckold is the female equal to a male cuckold. A male cuckold is often simply called a cuckold as the fetish is more common in men. Cuckolds of any gender feel sexual pleasure when their partners have sex with someone else. They have similar feelings but may have a different focus. Anecdotal evidence suggests that cuckolds focus on their partner’s pleasure while cuckqueens focus on the pleasure of the third party.

Why People Are Into Cuckqueening

Cuckqueens receive masochistic pleasure from knowing their partners are intimate with someone else (that third person known as a cuckcake). They may feel jealous or humiliated by their partner, but also turned on by their infidelities. This dynamic should be consensual and not traumatic. The humiliation part is performative or the cuckqueen derives masochistic pleasure from it.

In most cuckqueen relationships, the cuckqueen has a submissive role while their partner is more dominant. Cuckqueens and their partners usually maintain these roles throughout their relationship and during sex, whether another person is present or not.

Some cuckqueens actively encourage their partners to have sex with others and may arrange dates for them. Others take a more passive role.

Some cuckqueens are present when their partners have sex with another person, while others give their partners privacy. If the cuckqueen is present, she may become sexually involved with her partner and their cuckcake, but only if she’s invited to be.

When cuckqueens are not present, they may like to hear stories about their partner’s sex outside their relationship, or they may not want to know the details. Some cuckqueens agree to one-to-one sex with others outside their relationship, while others permit group sex. Most cuckqueens are sexually involved with their own partners, but some have an arrangement where they are celibate. If a cuckqueen is bisexual, she may also have a female lover outside the relationship. It’s up to the cuckqueen and their partner to determine what works best for them.

More About Cuckqueen

Cuckolding should be mutually beneficial for all people involved. People interested in exploring sex with different people can make great partners for female cuckolds. If they don’t enjoy this, they should tell the cuckqueen and see if they can satisfy her fetish in another way, such as through cuckolding fantasies. Alternatively, they may decide to part ways and find more compatible partners.

Tips for Cuckolding in a Relationship

Cuckolding is different from swinging or threesomes because the cuckold does not physically take part in the sex. Acting on a cuckold fetish requires a certain level of commitment between the two original partners. Without an emotional connection, humiliation does not occur at the same level. As a result, there are many married cuckqueens.

While female cuckolds agree to their partners having sex with others, couples should take care with this arrangement. Couples should focus on maintaining a strong connection, even when one person has sex with someone else. Cuckqueens also get the most out of their partner’s nonmonogamy when they develop connections with their partner’s partners. Bringing people they are already connected to, such as the cuckqueen’s friends, into the bedroom can enhance a cuckqueen’s life. While the cuckqueen should ideally have a good relationship with her partner’s partner, their partner should maintain some emotional distance from the other person they sleep with. Becoming emotionally intimate with a sex partner can destabilize the primary relationship.

The dynamics between a cuckqueen, a cuckqueen’s partner and the cuckcake can vary significantly based on what works for all parties. The partner and their cuckcakes may treat a cuckqueen in a positive, loving fashion, or they may humiliate the cuckqueen.

Humiliation may be accidental if the partner and cuckcake are so aroused by one another that they ignore the cuckqueen. It can also be more deliberate. For example, they may verbally abuse the cuckqueen or get her to perform humiliating acts, such as cleaning the sheets after they’ve had sex. A cuckqueen’s partner may have a long-term lover or sleep with other people on a more casual basis.

As the arrangements for cuckqueens vary substantially; a cuckqueen and her partner should talk openly when embarking on this kind of relationship. They should discuss what they think the relationship should look like, what turns them on and how they can create a relationship that meets both their needs.

They may discuss making the cuckqueen feel humiliated if she is attracted to BDSM or having her present for the sex if she is a voyeur. This kind of open communication is essential for a successful relationship with a cuckqueen. Without consent, having sex with someone else is just cheating. If both partners don’t express what they want out of the arrangement, it’s unlikely to fulfill their needs.

Bringing other people into a committed relationship can be challenging, so some cuckqueens test the waters with webcam sex sites. Interacting with other people from a distance can be a good way to determine how both partners might feel about acting on these interests.

Cuckqueening and Safety

Safe sex is an important consideration for cuckqueens and their partners. While cuckqueens are usually monogamous, their partners are not. They should protect their cuckqueens from sexually transmitted infections and minimize the risk of their cuckcakes getting pregnant, as this could complicate their primary relationships. The partners of cuckqueens often use condoms with their cuckcakes and stay fluid bonded to their cuckqueens. Regular STI testing is also recommended for anyone who has multiple partners.


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