Pussy whipping is a form of BDSM play where a dominant strikes their submissive partner’s vulva. The dominant may strike the vulva with their bare hand or use a tool, such as a flogger or paddle, to pussy whip their partner. Pussy whipping is a form of impact play and pain/sensation play. It falls under the even broader category of pussy torture.
Pussy whipping may be a punishment or an entirely pleasurable activity. Dominants may use pussy whipping in a variety of different scenes, including humiliation play, edging, orgasm denial or orgasm control.
Pussy Whipping: Term Origins
Conversationally, the term pussy whipping can describe a woman in a committed relationship dominating her partner. People who are "pussy whipped" typically follow their partner’s wishes. People might accuse them of being pussy whipped because the regular, good sex they receive encourages them to disregard their own desires. Instead, they focus on making their partner happy. The term implies that the pussy whipped person is a slave to their partner, who may withdraw sex if their needs are not met. Pussy whipping is a derogatory term that suggests someone is weaker than their partner and is intended to be emasculating when applied to straight men.
The colloquial use of the term pussy whipping dates back to the 1950s. It is an extension of the term pussy, which has been a vulgar slang term for vagina or vulva since the 19th century. By the late 1980s, mainstream publications like Rolling Stone and Vanity Fair wrote about pussy whipping in the colloquial sense. Feminist punk band Bikini Kill celebrated the term and its empowerment of women with the release of their 1993 album, Pussy Whipped.
The term pussy whipping can be problematic, especially when it’s used colloquially. Some people feel the word pussy is offensive and disrespectful. They may feel the term objectifies them by reducing them to their genitals. When applied to straight relationships, the term pussy whipping can also perpetuate toxic masculinity. It suggests that men should assert their will rather than putting their partner’s desires first at times.
Pussy Whipping in Pornography
Pornography may feature pussy whipping as it's a highly visual act. BDSM pussy whipping may be a component of pornography showing the power exchange of dominants and submissives. It often shows a submissive that's whipped by one or more dominants. Pussy whipping may be the focus of these videos or it may get shown alongside other BDSM activities, such as bondage and spanking. This type of porn can be very visually stimulating, as it depicts acts that many people find taboo. People who fantasize about pussy whipping may find watching this kind of porn is a safe outlet for their desires.