How to pleasure

8 Ways to Figure Out Which Anal Toy Is Right for You

Published: JUNE 5, 2018 | Updated: MAY 12, 2020
There are so many kinds of anal toys. Which one's right for you all boils down to how you aim to use it.

Finally, it's time! You've decided that you're ready to take the plunge - that you're ready to add an anal toy to your toy box. Whether you've only played with fingers before and want something larger, want to surprise a partner with a new toy, or are just trying to experience brand new sensations from your body, an anal toy can be the solution.

After all, anal toys can be very versatile. Are you familiar with all of the types of anal toys out there? There are prostate massagers, butt plugs, wirelessly-controlled vibrating butt plugs, anal beads, anal stretching toys, anal dildos, douching supplies, and more.

Picking out the perfect anal toy can seem a bit daunting. There are hundreds of anal toys out there - each with individual designs and specific uses. An anal toy that works well for wearing out and about might not be the best fit for solo masturbation. Toys designed for stretching to play with the biggest dildo you own will likely not be a good fit for a quick stretching before anal sex. So how are you supposed to know which toys will be the best fit for you?

With a bit of knowledge, of course! Read through this guide and find the intention that most closely matches your own. Read through the suggestions for the best types of anal toys, and you'll be set!


You Want to Wear It Outside

Butt plugs! The most important aspect of taking your anal play out and about is having a sex toy that stays in, without fail, without worry and without discomfort. That means butt plugs are the way to go. However, not every butt plug is going to be your perfect pal. Make sure to do some trial runs in the privacy of your own home. You want to be able to stand up, walk around, and bend over without feeling the toy slip out of your bottom. Worst-case scenario? Make sure to wear underwear when wearing the plug outdoors - just in case it slides out. Your plug sliding out in the middle of the grocery store can be embarrassing, but that embarrassment hits a whole new level if it drops onto the floor beneath you while you're standing in the checkout line. (To learn more, read Is it OK to wear a butt plug all the time?)

You Want to Wear It Around the House

There's something about enjoying the "naughty" feeling of anal play while doing mundane household chores that puts a little sexy spontaneity into your day. If you'd like to enjoy a hands-free anal toy experience while doing things around your home, you're going to want to go, again, with a butt plug. Unlike a butt plug you'd choose to wear outside, you don't have to be as particular with an indoor toy. While it might be frustrating to have your plug slip out occasionally, it's easy enough to go into your own bathroom and slide things back where they need to be. Consider a vibrating anal plug or a thicker butt plug than you'd usually consider because of the laid-back atmosphere of your home.

You Want Someone Else to Control It in Public

When you want someone else to control your pleasure in a "risky" environment, you're going to need to move towards a wirelessly-controlled vibrating butt plug. These have grown in popularity over the past few years. With the press of a button on the tiny remote, your partner will be able to control the intensity of the vibrations while the two of you sit over dinner at your favorite restaurant. Maybe they'll even bump the intensity, just a little bit, just in time for you to order your food. If you're planning on using your vibrating butt plug in a public space, make sure to do a test-run at home to ensure the vibrations are quiet enough – and that the plug stays in.


Read: Wanna Act Kinky in Public? Here's How to Do It Incognito

You Want to Use it to Prep for Larger Toys Over Time

Like anything else about the human body, your body can be "trained" to accept and enjoy larger and larger toys over time. In fact, this is usually the recommended path for those who are new to anal sensations and want to eventually enjoy anal sex. You start with a single, small toy and wear it for awhile until your body feels no discomfort from its penetration. You then choose a larger anal toy - and repeat the process. When choosing a toy to prep yourself for long-term enjoyment, you'll want to choose a toy that has a diameter that's larger than your current comfort level. If you choose a butt plug, you'll want to choose one that's only slightly larger than your current level - and then purchase again when you get comfortable. However, if you're on a limited budget (or don't want a treasure trove of butt toys!), it might be worth looking into a large dildo that has a nicely tapered size. That means the toy is much smaller towards the tip than it is at the base. The point of this type of dildo is that you slowly insert the dildo, day after day, and allow your body to adjust to the size. Don't expect to be able to take this dildo to the base - at least, not anytime soon. The point of buying a toy with such a varying size along the shaft is that you can use each point of the shaft as a new spot for stretching yourself.

Read: 7 Tips for Purchasing Giant Sex Toys


You Want to Use It to Prep for Larger Toys That Evening

Do you want to play with your biggest toy that evening? Would you like to be prepped and ready for anal sex that night? First off, if you're looking to prep yourself from the "hygienic" end, consider investing in a douche or enema kit. If you're looking to prep yourself for easier penetration, you need to find something that will help you adjust your butt to the size of a larger item. If you'd like to "set it and forget it", a butt plug just slightly smaller than the item you'd like to later receive can be a good choice. You can also get an anal dildo that's slightly smaller than the item you'd like to receive later.

You Want to Use It for Solo Masturbation

Any anal toy that you want to use for solo masturbation needs to be simple enough that you can "set it and forget it" or manipulate it with a single hand. Presumably, your other hand might be otherwise occupied! Butt plugs, with their "set it and forget it" mentality, can be a good addition to masturbation. However, you might be seeking more intensity from your anal toy. If that's the case, consider anal beads with an easy-removal handle. The helpful handle should make it easier to move your beads around with a single hand. If that's not up your alley, consider a dildo with a suction cup. The suction cup can keep the toy in place for hands-free penetration.

You Want to Use It as Foreplay With Your Partner

Every anal toy out there can be used as foreplay with a partner! You don't have to worry about size, ability to use it yourself, or the ability to be discreet. Pick whichever anal toys appeal to you. Butt plugs or anal beads can be great choices if you'd like to continue to explore each other's bodies with both hands as the item is inserted. Anal dildos can be pleasurable choices if you're looking for a more active way to explore anal sensations with your partner. An enema or douche can be an intimate and vulnerable way to ready yourselves for deep anal intercourse later on.


You're Male-Bodied and Want Hands-Free Orgasms

If you're male-bodied and want hands-free orgasms, your best bet is a prostate toy. While these toys usually have cumbersome bases that won't work for sitting on and slim diameters that don't work for stretching, they DO have a design that's specifically crafted to hit the prostate. You slip in the prostate massager, and with every internal clenching of your muscles, the toy will press up against the prostate. Some also vibrate for an extra kick! While achieving hands-free orgasms your first use is unlikely, quite a few users have been able to have hands-free orgasms after some practice. (Unfortunately, female-bodied individuals don't have a prostate, so while these toys may feel fantastic, they may not be orgasmic for female-bodied individuals.)

Read: Got a Prostate? 10 Awesome Toys to Try

Mistress Kay

Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.

Latest Sex Positions