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Can all women achieve multiple orgasms?

Ducky Doolittle
Profile Picture of Ducky Doolittle Ducky DooLittle is a sex educator from NYC. She is also the author of "Sex with the Lights On: 200 Illuminating Sex Questions Answered". Ducky has appeared in the New York Times, HBO's "Real Sex", "The Morning Show", MTV, NPR, "The Howard Stern Show" and Playboy TV, to name a few.  Full Bio

Can all women achieve multiple orgasms?


The simple answer? No. Can you have multiple orgasms? Perhaps.

Every orgasm is unique to the woman experiencing it. Some women will be multi-orgasmic by nature. Other women will play and explore and find they can expand their orgasmic capabilities. The idea of a multiple orgasm is rather vague. It does not account for the awesome variety of sexual response a human being can experience.

An orgasm, by definition, is a series of involuntary muscular contractions. Some women have very defined bundles of contractions. It is obvious to them when one orgasm stops and another starts. Other women will have a series of contractions in a row that blur together. For the blurring types, it can be impossible to tell when one orgasm ends and starts. Sometimes we call this an extended orgasm. Still other women will have one orgasm and then her clit or whole vulva becomes so sensitive or tingly that she does not want to be touched again for a period of time.

That said, it is possible to practice becoming more orgasmic. Here are a few tips for how to get the most out of your body.

Build Your Muscles
Your Kegel muscles to be exact. If an orgasm is a series of muscular contractions then it stands to reason that the stronger your muscles are, the bigger your orgasms will be. Doing Kegel exercises can suck at first. They are annoying and hard to do. But don’t give up! The more you exercise your pelvic muscles, the easier it gets and eventually you may find don’t need to do the exercises anymore. (Read up on Kegel exercises in For Better Orgasms, Flex This Muscle.)

Pump and Breathe
Pumping your pelvic muscles rhythmically during sex (alone or with a partner) will pull more blood and oxygen into your pelvis. And when you are trying to get the optimal use of your muscles, be it lifting weights, doing yoga or any other physical action, you breathe deep. You want to pack your blood stream with oxygen. Deeper breaths also fuel your response.

Throughout all of your sex play, tune in to the subtleties of your body. Pump those muscles and breathe deep. It may feel sort of mechanical at first but the more you do it, the more it becomes a habitual part of how you play.

Slow Your Roll
Our brains are naturally wired to find the fastest way to get things done but when it comes to your orgasm, it’s important that you fight that urge and slow down. You want to tease until the urge for an orgasmic release is undeniable. Use lube so that your inner and outer skin can stand up to the extended play.

Edge for Deeper Pleasure
Edging is the act of bringing yourself (or your partner) to the point where you are just about to orgasm, and then you pull back. Stop touching yourself for 20 or 30 seconds and then do it again. At the third attempt to orgasm, do it.

Most of the time edging will lead to a deeper, more profound orgasm. It also expands your vascular capillaries and ability to have deeper orgasms in general. Every once in a while when you edge you will not be able to orgasm on that third attempt. It’s totally frustrating when that happens but I have found the price is well worth the benefits.

Recognize Your Beauty
Whether your body will develop to a place where you are having bigger orgasms or multiple orgasms, I really want you to recognize your beauty. You don’t need to have the experiences that anyone else has. Just play. Love your body. Have fun. Stop comparing the kind of sex and sexual response you have to anyone else.

Have a question? Ask Ducky here.

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