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6 Steps to Choosing Bondage Restraints

Published: MARCH 3, 2017 | Updated: NOVEMBER 13, 2021
Choosing restraint cuffs boils down to one primary thought: your personal desires. This guide will give you six key steps in order to find the perfect bondage cuffs for you and your partner.

You've read some stories (maybe you even read "50 Shades of Grey"!), and now you've found that the idea of bondage turns you on a little bit. Congratulations! You've begun a journey into a whole new type of pleasure that can add to your sexual enjoyment. That's great! Bondage allows some people to feel pleasure in ways they never knew was possible. It's a new and very intimate adventure with another person.

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Now that you've decided you want to try bondage, you may feel a bit lost in terms of what restraints would be perfect for you and your partner. There are quite a few choices out there, but we want to make sure you end up with something that makes your first and future experiences absolutely perfect. Are there certain colors you should be looking for? What about certain materials? Do you need it to lock?

Don't feel too overwhelmed; we're here to help! Just follow these six steps to choosing bondage restraints. These steps will help you figure out what's most important for you. Go step-by-step or skip around to what matters to you. There's no wrong way to use these steps. After all, this is entirely about your preferences and pleasure. (Not convinced that bondage is for you? Check out Why Bondage Can Be So Much Fun.)Step 1: Consider the Size of Your Cuffs

The first thing you should consider is the size of the cuffs. Most people's wrists and ankles are different sizes. Some wrist and bondage cuffs come in various sizes (small, medium, large). So, it may be useful to break out the tape measure and ensure that your cuffs are going to fit. A set of cuffs that fits the wrists may not fit the ankles, so consider measuring those as well.

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6 Steps to Choosing Bondage Restraints
These leather wrist and ankle cuffs provide a soft fit and firm restraint that beginners will love.Step 2: Determine the Possibility of Escape

Some cuffs are really difficult to get out of when you're wearing them. Other cuffs are very easy. Some people really love the sensation of "not being able to escape," but others will not be able to truly relax unless they know they can get out of their cuffs if needed. If you would like an easy way to escape, look for cuffs with Velcro fastening. If you'd like cuffs that are not so easy to get out of, look for cuffs that offer locking buckles. Regardless of what you prefer, make sure you always have an escape plan in case there is an emergency.

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6 Steps to Choosing Bondage Restraints

This pretty and practical under-the-bed restraint system includes Velcro cuffs for easy release.

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Step 3: Know Your Anchor Points

How do you plan on using your bondage cuffs? Sure, you can just wear them as adorable fashion accessories. However, most people usually want to use them for their designed purpose of restraint. With this in mind, you need to figure out how you want to be immobilized. Will you attach the cuffs to the bedposts? Will you want to attach them together? Many restraints feature a single O-ring for restraint purposes, but special cuffs may have multiple O-rings or come equipped with clips to attach the cuffs to each other. Think about how you want to be bound after the restraints are on your body.Step 4: Contemplate a Beginner's Bondage Set

If you haven't used bondage restraints before then you might consider purchasing a set designed for beginners. Many of these sets contain a multitude of matching items to help you explore your bondage or BDSM curiosities. These sets are usually very affordable and include beginner-friendly bondage items such as wrist restraints, ankle restraints, a blindfold, a collar, a leash, and some sort of impact toy (such as a feather or a flogger). If you're curious about bondage or BDSM, this is the most cost-effective way to explore before purchasing more expensive toys.

6 Steps to Choosing Bondage Restraints

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This five-piece beginner bondage kit provides plenty of options.Step 5: Enjoy a Matching Set

Some restraints and bondage accessories are made in matching color schemes with matching designs by the manufacturer. They are usually purchased separately unlike the boxed beginner's sets. If you're someone that prefers a perfect visual effect, you might want to keep the color and pattern in mind while purchasing your toys.Step 6: Think About Special Features

Once you've figured out the basics, you'll want to think about any special features you'd love to see in your restraints. Many restraints are very basic. If you're looking for something special, there are other choices available. Some restraints are crafted with extra padding and handle-holds for suspension bondage. Some are designed for long-term, upright play, where lots of pressure could be placed on the wrists. Other restraints are made from neoprene and water-safe materials that make them safe to take into the bathtub or pool. There are also restraints that provide extra security features. Look at special additions to make sure your bondage fantasy comes true.

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Now that you have a good idea about what to look for in your restraints, take your ideas straight to your favorite toy retailer! You'll be able to easily see your choices dwindle down into a manageable list. Why not purchase a couple of your final choices and find out, first-hand, exactly what matters to you? Happy shopping!

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Mistress Kay

Mistress Kay has a fondness for all things sexual. With a house that's quickly running out of room for all of her reading and vibrating pleasures, she spends her free time reading, writing, and learning about the sexual universe with her partners. She can be reached at Kinky World.

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