You’re Not Alone
Crying after sex, or post-coital tristesse, is extremely common in all genders. Ask your friends, and I can guarantee that a few of them have also shed some sexy tears. Almost everyone I talk to, regardless of gender, has cried at least once after sex.
It Doesn't Always Mean You're Sad
During sex, hormone levels escalate and build, no matter what your mood. Crying after sex is simply a release of that tension. If you’re more sensitive at the time, the chances that you'll cry will obviously be higher, but whether your tears are happy ones, sad ones, or something in between, be sure to take care of yourself if you start crying; it can be emotionally draining and you may need a little extra TLC when it happens.
The Best Cure Is to Just Let It Go
I’m in love with the song "Let It Go" from Disney's "Frozen" right now. It sums up my feelings about emotions: They’ll come out no matter what, in ways that are harmful to you and the ones you love, so let them go and be your unique, complex self. There is no shame in crying after sex. If anything, it can be a compliment to the person who gave you such an amazing orgasm. So let it go. (Get some tips on how to deliver more pleasure to your partner in The No.1 Secret to the Female Orgasm.)
Crying Can Increase the Intensity of Your Orgasm
An orgasm is the physical release of tension built up in your body. Crying is the emotional release of tension built up in your body. Combine the two, and bam! You get an amazing, full-body, mind-blowing release. I’m not saying you should purposely try to make yourself cry (although you’re welcome to do that if it’s your thing), but holding back may hinder your orgasm, so let it go, tears and all.
You Don't Have to Orgasm to Want to Cry
Sometimes when I’m topping
someone and don’t come to completion myself, I still feel like crying after sex, often even more so than if I do orgasm. That’s because my hormones and emotions have built up during my arousal and are looking for a way to get their release. Remember to take care of yourself, no matter what your sexual role, and take some time to cry (and cum) later if you can’t now.
Be a Good, Supportive Partner
If your partner starts crying, ask them what you can do to help. Some people may want to be held, others may want some space. Remind them that there is no shame in crying and encourage them to let it all out and finish completely. Crying is like cumming, you’re most satisfied when you’re completely drained.
I hope this helped all of you feel more comfortable and less alone in the emotional roller coaster that sex can be.
With love and light,