Having multiple orgasms is still pretty new to me. I enjoy it, but although other people say that their orgasms grow in intensity each time, I'll admit that I find each subsequent orgasm to be less intense and less pleasurable than the one before it. For that reason, I still haven't made multiple orgasms a regular part of my sex life.
During my experimentation, I found a noticeable lack of articles and information about how women can achieve multiple orgasms. It seemed like every person who was enjoying them was just naturally blessed with the ability. There didn't seem to be too much information about training your own body unless it had a spiritual slant to it. While I think multiple female orgasms can definitely be a spiritual experience, I think a lot of people also just want more orgasms. Based on my own experience, I came up with a few tips to help you achieve the elusive multiple O.
Get off with a little help from Kinkly readers' FAVORITE toy: The LELO SONA Cruise!
Tips for Achieving Multiple Orgasms
Train Your Body
It's fascinating how almost everything about our bodies can be trained. Eat less, and your body adjusts its metabolism to make up for it. Drink alcohol every day and you'll adjust to the effects and require more alcohol to get the same buzz. Your orgasms can be the same way. If your body is used to just having a single orgasm, your brain may shut down to arousal after that first orgasm hits. To get more, you're going to have to train your body to continue to experience arousal and pleasure. To start the process, work on continuing the stimulation, sexy ideas and images after that first orgasm. This can help your brain and body learn that there's more to come. It may take some time, but I found I was able to get more aroused after my first orgasm with practice.
Keep Up the Stimulation
Almost every guide out there says that you need to continue the physical stimulation after you've achieved orgasm. For many vagina-owners, the clitoris becomes too sensitive to touch at this point, so touch yourself in sensual areas that don't feel too sensitive. Resume touching your orgasmic centers within a minute or two of the last orgasm to keep your body from going too far down the resolution phase.
Find Great Stimulation (or the Right Toy?)
Finding good stimulation is important to reaching multiple peaks as well. I love powerful vibrators, but I find that too-powerful vibrators will start to make my body numb and make multiple orgasms impossible. Find something that works for you without overstimulating or causing numbness. (Kinkly reviewed the LELO SONA Cruise and found it be a machine when it comes to multiple orgasms. Read the review here.)
Give Yourself Permission to Fail
It helps so much to accept that multiples orgasms - or orgasm in general - might not happen and that that's OK. While I did have a goal in mind (more orgasms!), it really helped me to understand that discovering multiple orgasms might be a long process and that today might not be the day for those multiples to happen. I gave myself permission to give up if I just didn't think it was going to happen that day - and that took the pressure off.
This entire process is so much easier if you find something that's arousing to you in the first place. Having orgasms is just as much a physical battle as it is a mental battle. Give yourself the best methods to succeed. Find a good erotic story, fantasy, porn movie, or whatever gets you off to help you continue your arousal after that first orgasm.
Relax Your Body
This might sound counter-intuitive, but I was having problems achieving multiple orgasms because I was too tense. I was so tense and expectant that it all felt like hard work. Then, one time when I had decided it was useless and I wasn't going to achieve any more orgasms, I relaxed my body in annoyance - and I instantly had an orgasm. Make sure that you're relaxing all of those muscles and allowing them to occasionally tighten, much like you'll notice you do when you're climbing the hill towards your first climax. (Read more in Stop Worrying About Orgasms. Seriously.)
Finally, remember to explore your body with curiosity and self acceptance. Multiple orgasms don't happen for everyone, but you can learn a lot about your body by trying to have them. Just enjoy the ride.