This is another item that seems like it could potentially work as an uncomfortable, unsexy condom. Deep down though, we all know that zip-top bags are not ribbed for anyone's pleasure.
Why It's a Bad Idea: Aside from not wanting anything with square corners on your penis or in your vagina, sandwich baggies simply have not been tested for the purposes of preventing pregnancy or disease. Heck, they can't even prevent your coworkers from stealing your lunch.
If something was made for medical purposes, surely it's safe for sex, right? Nope. Even if you find some gloves that are latex rather than vinyl, and that don't have any powder in them, this is still a bad idea.
Why It's a Bad Idea: Gloves are thicker than condoms, so sensation would be greatly reduced. Also, unless you have five thin penises (or four thin penises and a thumb-shaped sack), a glove is not going to fit. Couple that with the standard caveats like a lack of lube and the possibility of it ending up inside your partner and you've got a five-fingered recipe for genital disaster.
Yes, really. I was horrified at the very idea that someone would use the actual skin of last night's dinner to prevent pregnancy and disease. Yet, it came up on a list of things Brits have used instead of condoms. And if I have to know about it, so do all of you!
Why It's a Bad Idea: If the aroma of chicken mixed with sex isn't reason enough to avoid this one, how about the fact that cooked chicken skin will in no way hold up against friction. Honestly, this is just so utterly disgusting, it's enough to put me off of both sex and chicken for a while.
Choose Actual Condoms for Your Sexy Time
Ultimately, we all know that no weird condom substitute out there is safer than a condom. And condoms are great. There are plenty of places to buy them. You can probably even get some for free. Depending on where you live, you might even be able to get them delivered right to your door. All told, there's really no reason not to use a real condom. And let's face it, kids, a little lubricated rubber is a whole lot sexier than any of these alternatives, not to mention safer.