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11 Creative Ways to Have More Sex During the Holidays

Published: DECEMBER 19, 2019 | Updated: JUNE 6, 2022
If you’re visiting friends or family over the holidays, here are a few ideas on how to maintain intimacy without landing on the naughty list.

The holiday season is here, which means it’s time for festive sex and hometown hook-ups! A recent survey of 2,000 people conducted by EdenFantasys found that half of Americans admit they're more frisky during the merriest time of the year.


“According to the National Center for Health Statistics, months August and September have the most births each year,” said Fred Petrenko of EdenFantasys. “This corresponds perfectly with our findings of Americans being quite frisky during the holidays. We all love winter cuddles.”

So, if you’re visiting friends or family, how do you sneak in a little sexy time? Here are a few ideas on how to maintain intimacy without landing on the naughty list:1. Book a Hotel Room

“If you can get a hotel room, you need to get a hotel room,” says Tasha Reign, adult film star and producer. "It gives you the ability to show up and be present with your family, but when you leave, you can engage in much-needed intimacy with your partner."


Don't forget to take along some of your favourite sex toys to spice up the night as well. What could be better than some guaranteed alone time with your partner? Guaranteed alone time and a vibrating butt plug, like Ditto by We-Vibe.

We-Vibe Ditto vibrating butt plug

2. Be Respectful

While the risk of getting caught may be hot, you probably don’t want Aunt Bea to walk in on you getting busy. “Don't have sex anywhere you're going to get caught or anywhere that would be considered highly inappropriate,” says certified sex coach, sexologist and author Gigi Engle.

“Some experts may tell you the garage or the pantry are fun for a quickie, but I honestly think that's highly disrespectful. There are no hard and fast rules. Just be respectful of your family and have sex in places that are private.”3. Keep it Simple

“Now is not the time to get super creative with the sex moves and kink,” says Engle. “You're having sex because it feels good, keeps you sane when your family is being super stressful and gives you a chance to be close to your partner.


"Nurture your pair-bond and enjoy your time together, but save the wild sex adventures for when you get home in a few days. They'll still be waiting for you. I promise.”

This advice works for sex toys too. You probably don't want to cart along your whole array of toys to your relative's house. Choose a vibrator that you can use in a variety of different ways!

We-Vibe Wish vibrator


4. Bring Be-quiet Props

“Maybe bring a gag or something that will stop you from being loud. It can even be a mask if you want to get really kinky,” suggests Reign. “But definitely a gag is hot. Or some kind of scarf, or something that reminds you not to make crazy noises. I feel like when you have sex, and you're in the moment, you're making crazy noises, sometimes you almost make louder noises when you're trying not to. So, you have to implement a tool to make sure sex isn't loud.”

Do whatever you have to do to keep sex sounds to a dull roar and not offend family members.


When it comes to toys, make sure you choose quiet ones as well! Rave by We-Vibe is a deliciously powerful G-spot vibrator that also happens to be whisper quiet! You won't have to worry about Aunt Bea hearing a weird buzzing sound and coming to investigate it.

We-Vibe Rave vibrator

5. Take Advantage of Your Family's Schedule

If you are sharing a living space, and especially a room, work around other people’s schedules. As Engle shares, “This doesn't mean telling your sister that you and your partner are going to have sex, per se, but more like knowing where she is before you get it on. If she's gone Christmas shopping or food shopping, you know you're in the clear for a little bit.”

If you know your relatives are going to be gone ahead of time, you can start the teasing early with a wearable sex toy, like the panty vibrator Moxie by We-Vibe. By the time the front door clicks shut, Moxie will have you aching to get straight to it.

We-Vibe Moxie vibrator

6. Have a Quickie

“Quickies are a great option and don't just have to wait until everyone finally goes to sleep,” says sexpert Kayla Lords. “Couples may want to run ‘last-minute’ errands together, drive to a secluded area, and have quick sex in the car.”

Or, Lords suggests, plan a family outing for the extended family and kids, but take separate vehicles. “They'll probably never notice that you're 20 minutes late – but you'll know you waited until everyone left and got it on as fast as possible before you left the house,” says Lords.

To make your quickies even more exciting, slip a small, incognito sex toy, like the Tango by We-Vibe, into your bag. This pocket-sized, powerful vibrator is perfect to keep nearby for whenever you get the opportunity for a little pleasure time with your partner.

We-Vibe Tango vibrator

7. Take a “Nap”

“Assuming you have your own room with your partner and aren't sharing one, the easiest thing to do is say you're going to ‘take a nap.’,” says Engle. “This gives you an excuse to get away with your partner – one that your family will know not to interrupt. No one wants to disturb a person who's napping.”

Still got that Tango by We-Vibe in your pocket?

8. Make Use of the Shower

Make multitasking your friend – it saves time to jump in together. “Since there are multiple people in the house, taking a shower together to ‘conserve hot water’ probably isn't that weird,” says Engle. “You don't need to announce to the family that you're taking a shower, but if someone sees you both coming out wet and wearing towels from the bathroom, it wouldn't be that bizarre.” Don't get too creative with penetration. Instead, Engle suggests enjoying some hand sex or oral sex while showering. “Remember to keep an eye on time,” she reminds. “If you're in there for 40 minutes, people are going to come banging on the door. And no one wants that.”

Add waterproof sex toys that make little to no noise into the mix to get you there faster, suggests Amy Baldwin, Sex Educator, Sex and Relationship Coach, and Co-Host of the Shameless Sex Podcast.9. Think Outside the Box

In case you’ve forgotten, sexologist Dr. Jill McDevitt, reminds there are a million and one ways to have sex. “Intercourse may not be doable – if you are, for instance, sleeping on an air mattress in your parent’s living room,” says McDevitt. “Intercourse involves nudity, moving and shaking of the bed and space, potentially some slapping noises, clean up, and is generally more time consuming. But that doesn’t mean there can’t be sexual connection in tight quarters and crowded family gatherings.”

Instead, she suggests:

  • A slap on the butt or a grope of a breast as you pass each other in a hallway.
  • Leaning in closer than you need to when reaching to pass the gravy boat.
  • A quick but passionate make-out session when you find yourselves the only two in the kitchen.
  • Erotic body caressing, ear lobe nibbling, clitoris/penis petting, or dry-humping (all quieter activities than intercourse back on that air mattress at night)

Oral sex is also an option that is typically quieter than traditional sex. “Take advantage of the opportunity to please your partner orally,” says Angela Watson, sex therapist and blogger. “This could be a great opportunity to try 69ing if this isn't something you often do.”

The panty vibrator Moxie by We-Vibe is the ultimate toy to help you think outside the box this holiday season. This wearable vibrator is app controlled and highly discreet. The only limit to how you can use this toy is your imagination!10. Schedule It

“If you have to stay within the confines of your family home, you have to figure out a way to schedule in time for sex,” says Reign. “It sounds kind of boring, but I’m a believer of if you’re not having enough sex, you have to work it in. It’s like everything in life, how are you ever going to get what you want if you’re not planning it?”11. Use app and Remote-controlled Sex Toys

Even if you’re miles apart, consider buying a wearable toy that allows your significant other to play with your privates from afar via app or Wi-Fi. For long-distance relationships or some good orgasmic, stress-relieving fun, these toys are a game-changer.'

We-Vibe Sync used with remote We-Connect app

We-Vibe's We-Connect app allows partners to control each other's toys from anywhere with an internet connection. Even if you have to spend the holidays apart, toys like Pivot, Melt and Vector, give you the ability to engage in passionate moments with your partner regardless of the distance between you.

Ryn Pfeuffer

Ryn Pfeuffer is a versatile print and digital writer specializing in sex, lifestyle, and relationship topics. She got her start in the mid-90s at the Philadelphia Weekly, managing a 10-page section of the newspaper and more than 500 lonely hearts.Her professional stock skyrocketed when she started writing a saucy (and pre-Carrie-Bradshaw-era) dating advice column called “Ask Me Anything.” She appeared regularly on local radio stations and late-night TV as an expert on everything from grooming habits to threesomes.Over the past two decades, her work has appeared in more than 100 media outlets including Marie Claire, Playboy, Refinery29, The Globe and Mail, The Washington Post, WIRED, and Thrillist. She adopted a pseudonym and was AVN’s (Adult Video Network) first female porn reviewer – while penning children’s books at the same time.More recently, she is the author of 101 Ways to Rock Online Dating (2019). She lives in Seattle with her rescue dog, Mimi. You can find her on Twitter @rynpfeuffer or IG @ryn_says

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