May is Masturbation Month! Let's all put our hands in the air and wave them to celebrate. It's okay if you only want to raise one hand...we understand. Sex Stories We Love kicks off the season of self-love with the who, what, where, when, why, and how basics of masturbation!
Dispelling Masturbation Myths
Okay, let's get these myths about masturbation out of the way so we can all enjoy our one-handed reading without any fear. That these ideas still persist in a testament to just how fucked up our sex education systems have been. Fortunately, a cultural shift has happened over the past few decades that is moving masturbation away from shame and into acceptance. While it's still not a topic of everyday conversation, it's also not a subject of sheer terror. Formerly, to be thought of as someone who touches themselves for sexual pleasure wastantamount to being a social pariah. How ridiculous is that?! We've got a lot of dialing back to do when it comes to perceptions about sex. And fixing our ideas on self-pleasure is paramount among them.
Join the Club
Membership has its rewards...and those rewards will include hot, fun orgasms. It is not surprising that jack-off clubs exist. What I do find odd is that they aren't more common! Whether it's just hitting the pub for pints or organizing specific groups of male bonding like fraternities and lodges), guys have long had a strong urge to get together out of common dudeness. So it is not surprising, regardless of sexuality, that men are drawn to the idea of enjoying sexual pleasure together in a shared space. Would jack-off clubs be more popular if masturbation hadn't been stigmatized for so long? Would it just be another example of male bonding? As out attitudes to both masturbation and sexuality change, it will be interesting to see if "popping down to the pub" turns into "going out for a rub" turns into a commonplace Friday night.
Giving birth takes a tremendous toll on the body. Sure, it is the miracle of childbirth and is a wonderful thing. Yet, it is literally squeezing out a new human. The physical stress endured can be quite overwhelming. In the weeks after having a baby, it is natural to want to return to your old routines, of which masturbation might play a big role. As well, masturbation is a wonderful stress reliever and mental health aid—something that will be of great benefit in the early days of parenting. Fortunately, there aren't any hard and fast rules about enjoying masturbation after childbirth. Just listen to your body (and possibly your doctor), understand your healing, and play accordingly.
Around the World in 80 Wanks
What would your masturbation map look like? What stories could you tell about where you've wanked? Some folks prefer to be alone. Others enjoy the thrill of public spaces (please remember to be respectful of others). Newness of location can be a tremendous turn-on, but the comfort of home also has an appeal. Some wanks are planned and preferred, others are spur of the moment sexiness. There's a whole world of options out there!
So, we've already seen that masturbation is about pleasure, health, and well-being. It is about comfort, self-care, and personal satisfaction. Yet, why we masturbate can be more than that: masturbation is also rebellion. It is still a shot to the patriarchy, the religious doctrine and the governmental controls that have all held our bodies in their grip. For far too long, we've been told that touching our bodies is a sin, that it isn't necessary because sex should only be in a relationship between a man and a woman. These dictates were put in place by men who wanted to maintain power over sex. Because if people are happy, if people have agency, if they have stronger mental health and self-esteem, they will rise up. And we're seeing that. We're seeing a shift in sexual understanding and power. Let's use this month to continue this trend.
So Many Options!
Finally, the prevailing idea is that if you have a vulva, you masturbate with a vibrator. What if you're not into vibes? Good thing there are many different ways to enjoy self-love without using a vibrator!
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