Let's strike up the challenging conversations. There are so many sex-related topics that are still considered taboo and impolite. That's bullshit. Let's get it all out there. This week's Sex Stories We Love opens the conversations we need to have.
The Power of the Glory...Hole
Oh Oh Oh Canada! If you can call it like it is, more people will understand what you mean. Recently, the British Columbia Centre for Disease Control issued some guidelines around safer sex in our COVID times. I wonder if the BCCDC guide writer knew they'd set Twitter ablaze when they included the actual words "glory hole." Rarely do governmental notices include such common parlance. Makes it seem downright saucy! Moreover, it was an important step in truly communicating sex in 2020. For far too long, sex education has focused on biological terms. Now, this is also important to move us away from juvenile euphemisms for body parts. However, a glory hole is a glory hole. Just describing it would not likely have registered as strongly in people's minds. It is the most accepted term for a hole in a way through which various sex acts can happen. Sure, it caused Twitter to twitter, but it was a good call and a positive message on sexual language for other sexual guides to come.
People Have Periods
It is hard to say "thanks" to JK Rowling for anything related to trans folks given the storm of awful the author kicked up in her continuing assault on trans rights. The only silver lining is that more people are talking about, learning about, and starting to understand more about trans people. One important experience that is rarely discussed is that some transgender people have periods. It is good to see Callally, a period-care company spreading awareness and understanding by sharing sharing trans folks' stories, because regardless what Rowling spouts, it isn't just women who menstruate.
Transphobia in the Sex Blogging Community
Let's not think that transphobia is the domain of rich and famous writers. Unfortunately, even the sex blogging community can be infiltrated by those who are more interested in punching down and taking jabs at the transgender community. I came across the post in question (since deleted) and was aghast at its blatant and horrifying message. The writer who thought himself quite clever with this wordplay and some folks truly lapped up his message. It was quite disheartening. This thoughtful response (and many others on that original post) demonstrated that our trans friends are loved and considered, despite the rambling of some fool.
Sharing Is Caring
Everyone has the right to discuss or not discuss their sex, kinks, and fetishes. If you want to talk about your thrills and chills, hopefully you have caring and honest friends who understand and accept you. If you don't want to talk about what gets you off, hopefully you have caring and honest friends who understand and accept you. Sharing these details about yourself and can be downright tricky and scary. We live in a particularly judgmental society. It might be challenge your friends to learn these details about you. At the same time, if you open up, they might as well. Talking can help everyone.
Evolving Sexual Understanding
In a world that boasts so many different forms of communication, we remain very insular inside our cultural bubbles. It is a great big world out there full of many different people who have different experiences—particularly when it comes to sex and sexuality. Thank goodness we still have old fashioned books to help us get to know our fellow humans. As with other sex nerds, I'm eager to pick up a copy of Leila Slimani's Sex and Lies: True Stories Of Women's Intimate Lives in The Arab World. Many of us, myself included, have not been exposed to stories of women's sexuality within Islamic culture. The opportunity offered in these coming pages is rare, and to better understand this sexual culture—and how change is happening within it—is too important to pass up.
Folded with Love
Finally, my heart will always belong in the zine world. I got my start with my zines and I'm glad it is a positive place for BIPOC, trans, queer, sex worker, and other marginalized folks. Long live cut and paste press!