We’ll totally understand if you don’t write long comments on Sex Stories We Love this month. It is hard to type with one hand. Remember to give all of the sex bloggers and writers out there some extra love—they are giving up some special times to bring you all of this great material!
Self-Love and Silliness
May the 4th be with you—but not just the 4th...the whole damn month! Recycled Star Wars joke aside, May is Masturbation Month and every year more and more notice is placed on the most basic of sexual practices: self pleasure. Whether you’re talking jillin’, jackin’, whackin’, or punishing a simian for some naughty misdeed, the opportunity to consider and discuss masturbation is an important opportunity to further our understanding of sex in countless different ways. However, we all know how sex talks can get—overly thinky, debated to death, and as unsexy as an actual spanked monkey. So, let’s have some fun with it! Let’s make opening up about masturbation fun! Humour is a fantastic way to broach topics people find challenging. So, to start things off, I’m going to share a piece that I’ve been holding onto for a little while to open this year’s Masturbation Month—because who doesn’t want to know How to Make Yourself Cum So Hard You Fall Off the Bed and Down the Stairs.
All Hail Sex Nerds
I can’t help but think that the increasing acceptance and understanding of masturbation is one of the reasons that sex can now be a casual and relatable topic of discussion in many different settings. Whether out and about among friends or in intimate situations with people you’re interested in getting even more intimate with. We’re talking, and that is great. If you look back, people didn’t talk about sex. And they definitely didn’t talk about masturbation. I certainly can’t pinpoint when it changed everywhere, but in my experience, there was a time in the early 1990s when we weren’t talking about sex at all...and then...something happened. The floodgates opened and suddenly what you did with your hand in your pants was on everyone’s lips. Not so coincidentally, this was also the rise of the Sex Nerds! And we are lucky to have them! Sex Nerds, like Kate Sloan, are researching, documenting, writing and teaching—and helping us all to better understand sexual health and pleasure.
Sex Work Understanding Wanting
Isn’t this so often the case in the rescue mentality? There’s a new Hot Girls Wanted documentary and this edition is turning out to be just as controversial as the first. These films explore the porn industry, specifically focusing on issues surrounding exploitation and empowerment. They also feature a heavy dose of saviour complex, and, in doing so, fall into the trap they are supposed to be exposing. With the release of Hot Girls Wanted: Turned On, a number of performers have spoken out to say they were featured without their permission and one has noted her real first name was revealed in the film. How is this not exploitation? How does this not disempower these performers? Netflix, Rashida Jones, and the producers of these documentaries are showing their true colours by turning a profit on someone else’s labour and challenges.
Mind the Orgasm Gap
If you’re familiar with this column, you’ll know that I enjoy porn for a variety of reasons! I like the visual and I like the social aspects. I like that pleasure is displayed and shared and can be discussed. And, of course, I like it when it is hot. There is one thing that I’m not that fond of, when it comes to porn. That is how it reinforces the idea that when the guy blows his load, the sex ends. While this thinking wasn’t “invented” by porn, it has certainly continued with the popularity of skin flicks. This has lead to what has been coined the orgasm gap. Certainly, I think we all hope that the opportunity to enjoy orgasm should be available to all, but are we putting too much emphasis on getting off? The incomparable Cara Sutra explores the potential pitfalls of falling too hard for the orgasm gap.
What to Do with a Three-Hour Wait
The Mile High Club has always been a pinnacle of sexual achievement. I mean, you’re in the air, defying gravity, and being super naughty—how does this not appeal?! Well, it seems that flying the sexy skies has lost some of its appeal in favour of a more practical approach. Instead of using a long flight to sate the libido, folks are opting to stay a little grounded. Oh, people are still getting it on when they travel...but they’re earning frequent fucker miles without leaving hard soil. It seems the in thing to do is to punch your ticket before getting on the plane. This is definitely more appealing than the small, pungent bathrooms on airplanes!
Finally, it is always good to keep our human sexual experiences in perspective. We are, after all, just another animal on this planet. While our animal cohabitants, such as the dragonfly and dolphin certainly have different sexual responses, we can always be learning from them.