Okay, it may be an odd time to discuss the potential of open, non-monogamous or polyamorous relationships when we're supposed to be isolating, but let's open up some very relevant discussions in this week's Sex Stories We Love.

Lovers in a Dangerous Time

The COVID-19 pandemic has put many different relationship dymanics. Whether you're working from home and in much closer, daily quarters with your people or just dealing with the stress of these challenging times, dealing and coping with the ones we love has now become a daily consideration. But how do people who have more than one partner deal with being away from one or more of their people in this pandemic situation? This can't have been easy for people in non-monogamouos or poly relationships, whether they've chosen one or some people to be with, instead of others or if they have separated from all of their people.

The Time Is Not Right

Choosing who you see during self-isolation or after it will be very difficult for some, and that might be an even bigger challenge for poly and non-monogamous folks. We are not going to be out of the woods right away, so we are all going to need to keep up the good practices to flatten and crush the curve. To do this, it is crucial to heed these very wise words from K-Ghislaine. This take is a bare bones raw plea to put non-monogamy on hold during this crisis...and it is entirely essential.

Q & A

Okay, okay...let's get back to the lives we want, beyond our current circumstances. When we can get back to getting busy, some folks are going to be curious about different relationship arrangements. They'll have questions about exploring open relationships, non-monogamy, polyamory, and everything in between...and here are some answers. Susan Wenzel offers some wonderful advice and guidance by addressing some of the most frequently asked questions that people have about pursuing a different relationship dynamic. There are many myths, misconceptions, and stigma that surround relationships outside of monogamy to get past, and this primer is a good place to start.

The Green-eyed Monster

Jealousy is a natural part of our lives. We experience it in many different ways, involving many different situations and circumstances. As we've probably all experienced, romantic jealously can be one of the most heart wrenching feelings to deal with. And some folks handle it better than others. One of the myths about non-monogamy and polyamory is that people involved in these types of relationships somehow don't get jealous or can easily overcome jealousy. This isn't actually true. Anyone, in any kind of relationship, can just jealous. The difference is that some folks in these relations have, sometimes, developed strategies to better deal with these feelings. And hopefully this ability is something that more people can learn.

Loving and Losing

Another myth about open, non-monogamous and polyamorous relationships is that these connections are not as meaningful as monogamous partnerships. This stigma is frequently felt over the course of a relationship, but it doesn't end if that relationship ends. If someone breaks up with one of their partners, they can feel as much heartbreak, loss, and pain as in a monogamous relationship. But there are added levels of feelings to deal with while grieving a lost connection. What can make a huge difference is how your remaining partner(s) help you cope with this loss. This can be a challenge, but also a huge help.

Recommended Reading

Finally, if you're looking for books, zines, and resources to explore polyamory, non-monogamy, and more, this reading list is a great start.