Sexual health

A New Year’s Resolution to Get It On – and Good

by Kinkly
Published: DECEMBER 28, 2017 | Updated: JANUARY 12, 2022
This year could be the year you have the best sex of your life. Here's how.

Got a New Year's resolution? Most of us do. Maybe you plan to eat better, or exercise more or spend more time with your family or put in more time at work. May we add one more suggestion? Find more time to get it on - and good. This could be the year you get on top of having the best sex ever (pun totally intended). What have you got to lose?


Here are some top suggestions on how to get started.

Get a Sex Toy

OK, so some of you will think this is a pretty tame suggestion, but hear me out. According to statistics from sex toy and adult novelty retailer Adam & Eve, only 44 percent of women between the ages of 18 and 60 have used a sex toy. That's more than you might have guessed, but it still means that more than half of you might be missing out on some seriously fun times with your body. Sex toys are fun to use with a partner, but masturbating regularly is also great for your sex life as a whole. After all, how can you expect your partner to figure out the magic combination that makes you come if you aren’t familiar with it yourself?

Find the G-spot

The G-spot has become the holy grail of female pleasure, both for women and their partners. For years, the clitoris was considered the only trigger for female orgasm (at least officially). Then in 1950, a physician by the name of Ernst Grafenberg found a mysterious patch of pleasure-producing tissue hidden within the vagina. Stimulating this spot produces a very different kind of orgasm, and may even cause squirting. You or your partner can explore this area manually (you’ll find this spongy tissue on the front wall of the vagina), or in positions such as doggie style or woman on top. Or, try out a G-spot vibrator.


Read: Pop Your Cork: The Ultimate Guide to Squirting Orgasms

Oh, and if you've already found your G-spot, consider conquering another hot spot you haven't mastered yet.

Indulge a Fantasy

If you can’t share your deepest, darkest sexual desires with a trusted sexual partner, you’ll probably never be truly satisfied in the sack. So, whether you’re longing for sexy lingerie, hankering to be hog-tied or breathless about trying a little BDSM, bring it up with your partner and work on incorporating it into your repertoire. Fantasy is half the fun - don’t leave it out! (Read up on one common fantasy in Why Bondage Can Be So Much Fun.)


Indulge Your Partner’s Fantasy

Now here’s the thing about sexual fantasies: They’re all about give and take. Come to think of it, that’s a prerequisite for any healthy sexual relationship. If you’re going to unload about your sexual quirks to your partner and expect him or her to fulfill your every desire, you’ll have to be willing to do the same. I’m not saying you should feel pressured to do everything your partner wants if you aren't comfortable with it, but you do have to be open to expanding your comfort zone. That isn’t always easy, but with some good communication, you’ll be glad you did.

Go the Whole Nine Yards

Be honest: Sometimes you just go through the motions. That’s OK. Life isn’t pornography, and you can’t have the best sex of your life every day. But when you have the time, it really pays to go all out for your partner. Get dressed up (or down!), set the stage and make an event out of giving each other pleasure. This is one luxury you really can afford to indulge in regularly.

Try Anal Sex

When it comes to anal sex, there are two distinct camps. That means that right now a portion of you are going ewwwww, while the rest of you are thinking ooooohhhhh yeaaah. That’s cool. I get it. But I’m throwing this one in because research suggests that more and more people are trying anal. It just isn’t that taboo anymore (but even if it was, who cares?). If it's something that piques your interest, bring it up with your partner. If there's any day to go out and live your own porno, this may just be it. (Get some background on bootie sex in What You Need to Know About Anal Sex.)


Spice Things Up

There's nothing wrong with the usual romp, but the New Year is a time when we tend to take stock of our lives and examine what we can do better. Take a stab at something brand new and push your sexual boundaries a bit. This might just be the year you have the best sex of your life.


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