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Female Dominance (Femdom)

Updated: DECEMBER 24, 2020
Reviewed by Dr. Laura McGuire
on December 7, 2020

Female Dominance (FemDom) refers to a BDSM scene or relationship in which a female-identifying person is a dominant partner or top partner. The dominant female takes charge of the submissive partner in these scenes or relationships. Their dominance gives them power over the submissive. This power may be psychological when it involves humiliating or ordering the submissive around. It can also be physical when it involves restraints or pain-giving instruments like whips.

A dominant female may have a number of different names, including Dominatrix, Mistress, Madame, Domme, and Pro-Domme. These terms have origins within the kink community as well as in the sex work industry, where they describe women paid to service several different submissive clients. People who incorporate Female Dominance into their intimate relationships may also identify with these terms. They may also call themselves a Domme, instead of a Pro-domme (short for professional Domme).

Female Dominants often engage in BDSM activities such as bondage, ballbusting, humiliation, face sitting, forced feminization, forced chastity, forced orgasm, and pegging. However, it can also include non-sexual activities where submissives serve a dominant female as well.

FemDom is a short form of the term Female Dominance. This shortened form has been used since at least 1986 when it described pornography featuring dominant females.

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More About Female Dominance (Femdom)

While FemDom is specific to BDSM, any woman can give her partner a thrill by donning a corset and some stilettos and throwing a little female domination into the mix. Start out small by ordering your submissive to worship you and your body or by making them grovel at your feet. If your submissive is being naughty, punish them with a little spank on the butt or a unique bondage position.

Engaging in female domination can be an excellent way for a female to enjoy better sex. As she is in charge, she can feel more comfortable ordering her partner around to improve their technique. She can also make sure they’re engaging in her favorite activities and that her pleasure is the focus. Many FemDoms do not reciprocate oral sex or allow their partners to masturbate during female domination sessions.

Before engaging in any BDSM play, make sure that all players consent to the activities. You should also follow all safety guidelines, including closely monitoring your submissive and establishing a safe word. If you’re engaging in activities where using a safe word is difficult, agree on a safe action that signals the end of play instead.

It’s a good idea to devise a plan of activities together that you’re both interested in trying. Creating this shared list can be a great way to bond with a partner interested in female dominance. This plan may include sexual activities reinforcing female dominance, such as those mentioned above, along with non-sexual activities like domestic chores the submissive should perform or house rules that they must obey. Incorporating non-sexual activities into the plan can transform a relationship into a female-led relationship, which many people attracted to female dominance enjoy.

Although from the outside it may look like the Domme has complete control in the relationship, the submissive in many ways has more control as they get to give or revoke consent.

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