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Friends-first swinging is a form of swinging where the parties involved start off as friends. Initial arrangements for friends-first swinging are often done outside of the bedroom. People get to know each other first, over coffee or shared meals. The engagement levels up once the members feel secure and comfortable with each other.
Some members of the swinging community have criticized friends-first swinging as being unconnected to the true essence of swinging. They claim that it is more about poly relationships – where partners want a relationship with the people they have sex with. Others, however, argue that safety is a requisite even when it comes to those who prefer the swinging lifestyle. It pays to know one's sexual partners first and not sleep with just anyone. It lessens one's risk of sexually-transmitted diseases and abuse, among other concerns.