Heteroflexible is a descriptive term for someone who considers themselves mostly heterosexual, or straight. This term may refer to a person’s identity, how they act, who they feel attracted to, or a combination of these. Heteroflexible people usually feel attracted to or engage in sexual experiences with people of the opposite gender, but occasionally feel drawn to people of the same gender. They may sometimes experience sexual or romantic same-gender attraction, or both. According to a 2019 study from Illinois Tech, as many as 15% of Americans may identify as heteroflexible.
Heteroflexible is the opposite of homoflexible. This term describes people who typically experience same-gender attraction or engage in same-gender activity but are occasionally drawn to people of the opposite gender. As with heteroflexible, homoflexible is sometimes regarded as another synonym for bisexual.
Elasexual can be used interchangeably with the word heteroflexible. Bi-curious is sometimes used as a synonym for heteroflexible, especially to describe someone open to a relationship or sexual encounter with someone of the same gender, although they haven’t had these experiences yet. Mostly straight is another common synonym for heteroflexible.
Origins of the Term Heteroflexible
Heteroflexible is a portmanteau of the prefix "hetero," meaning different, and flexible. While the experience of feeling mostly straight isn’t new, heteroflexible is a relatively new term for it. While its origins are unclear, the LGBTQ slang dictionary "When Drag is Not a Car Race" may be the first publication to use this term. Published in 1997, this resource defined heteroflexibility as “bisexual, or at least open to sexual experimentation.”
Yale University professor Laurie Essig also used the term in a 2000 essay for Salon. By 2002, The Buffalo News dubbed heteroflexible the “hot term being bandied about on campus.” At this time, it usually described people who identified as women and who occasionally felt attracted to or had sexual interactions with other women.
Heteroflexible vs Bisexual vs Homoflexible
The earliest definition of heteroflexible equated this term with bisexual. While there are some people today who still believe heteroflexibility is simply bisexuality under another name, others say these terms are quite different. People who identify as heteroflexible may feel drawn to people of the same gender less frequently than people who identify as bisexual. They may also feel their identity aligns more closely with heterosexuality. Others believe both terms suit them and are happy to use both bisexual and heteroflexible to describe their sexual identity or behaviors.
It is also important to note here that the labels homo- and heteroflexible are perceived as biphobic by some. While choosing the label that feels like the best fit is an individual journey, those who find themselves in the middle of the Kinsey scale may consider unpacking any learned biphobia and whether it is impacting they way they choose to identify.