Everything You Need to Know About a Safe Call

A safe call, also known as a silent alarm call, is a type of safety call that's often used within the dating and kink communities to keep people safe when meeting new people.The idea behind a safe call is that, before going on a date, the person arranges to call a trusted friend at a specific time. If the person doesn't call that trusted friend, the friend should assume something is wrong and notify the local police. Not only does this provide a potential deterrent to a malicious date before the two people have ever met up, but it also allows the local authorities to get on the trail more quickly in case something does happen.

The idea of the safe call originated in the kink community, but it's becoming more prevalent in dating as well. Because kinky people would regularly meet up to do kinky things with other kinky people for the first time (such as bondage or impact play), having a way to make sure their date didn't abuse that trust was vital.

So, whether you're meeting for kinky fun or just a few drinks, a safe call is a good idea when you're meeting a stranger. Here we'll take a look at safe calls, how they work and how you can make them work to help keep you safe when you're meeting new people.

On thing to note: While some people prefer the idea of a safe text, please stick to voice calls. In case of an emergency or violence, it could become much too easy for a predator to use your own phone if you're unable to do so. The sound of your voice adds an extra level of security.

What Information Should My Safe Call Include?

Ideally, your safe call should include as much personal information about yourself, your location, and your date as humanly possible. Include any information about your date's name, line of work, phone, contact information, photos, or social media profile links. You don't have tor provide this while speaking on the phone; you can get this information from your date's social media profiles and save it in a secure location your friend can access. Don't forget information about yourself, your car, and what you're wearing. You should also provide your trusted friend with details and a timeline about your date. If you know you and your date will be going back to a hotel and know the room number, provide those things to your friend as well - just in case.

You and your friend may want to come up with a "discreet" system of words you can use to communicate that something isn't right. In case of an emergency situation, this discreet system will let your friend know to call the police without alerting your malicious date - and potentially putting you in danger. For example, you can instruct your friend to ask about your plans for tomorrow evening while on the phone. You both can agree upon a response. If you respond with that response, for instance that you're "going bowling," then your friend will instantly know that something is wrong, and that they should call the police. Any other response will let them discreetly know that everything is going fine.

Why Do I Need It?

It's unfortunate that anyone has to worry about it, but your safety is important. Not every person out there is exactly who they seem to be. A safe call gives the authorities somewhere to start looking in case your date ends up taking a turn for the worse. Having this basic information from your safe call will let the authorities know who to look for as well as get them looking for you even faster.

Who Should I Use as My Safe Call?

It's important that you entrust the responsibility of your safe call to someone who can be trusted. This person needs to keep track of the time, check in on you and, if you don't respond, this person needs to promptly call the police. This type of task is best left for someone who isn't distracted by a party or some event of their own during the same time period.

It's vital that you also pick someone you are comfortable with. Don't choose a friend who may be biased or who may make you feel guilty if you need to ask for help. This person should be non-judgmental and ready to help in any way they can.