Whether you want to enjoy a little feel-good quickie or are planning to spend the entire weekend shut in the bedroom with your bucket of toys and the phone off the hook, knowing the proper ways to get off is critical for every woman. Studies show that women who masturbate regularly report greater sexual satisfaction and a more positive view of sex. But self-sustainable sex has another benefit: It feels good. And despite all sorts of cultural admonitions to the contrary, there's nothing wrong with enjoying it. Here are a few pleasure trips that are right at your fingertips. (Learn more about the importance of self pleasure in 10 Things You Don't Know About Self Love.)
Skin on Skin
Toys are great, but we often take our hands for granted. The "Patty Cake" technique can work anywhere, anytime and is one of the most basic masturbation techniques. Gently pat your clitoris with your pointer and middle finger, making sure to use different pressures and speed. Your little love bean will automatically stand at attention. From there, go with what feels good for you.
You can also try what's called the "open-faced sandwich" technique by using the palm of your outstretched hand and applying pressure to your lady garden by gently pushing down. Continue until you start feeling hot, and then start to push and let go, push and let go, never allowing your hand to break contact with the skin. (Learn more touch techniques in Stroke That: How to Rub Her the Right Way.)
One of the most private places to connect with yourself is in the bathroom. Plus, if you have water, you have all the tools you need for self pleasure. If you’re in the bathtub and want to tickle your fancy, slide your pelvis right under the faucet, and run the water in a gentle stream at your clitoris (make sure it's not too hot!). Using your elbows to prop up your butt. To turn up the heat, turn the water to a hotter temperature right before you’re about to orgasm.
If you prefer showering over baths, take the shower head off of its hook and use the water stream to give yourself a below-the-belt massage. Alternate between rubbing gently and firmly and always use a synchronized motion to escalate the experience.
Finally, there's a reason why you see so many hot tubs in sexy movies and pornography. Hot tubs are sexy, and those jets can propel you to a full-blown orgasm. Position your crotch right in front of the jets, standing far enough away for the water to hit you. Gradually move closer until the water's just right. (For more about having a healthy relationship with your body, check out The Two Biggest Barriers to a Satisfying Sex Life)
There are plenty of items in your house that you can get off with. It’s just a matter of selecting the one that’s perfect for you.
In the 1930s and '40s, vibrators were almost impossible to buy. But women made do. In fact, when vibrating toys were removed from store shelves in the 1920s, many doctors reported a rise in the use of electric toothbrushes among women. In other words, while sex toys are best, there are lots of great stand-ins. Whoever said a toothbrush was just for good oral hygiene? (Read more about vibrator history in Vibrators: Bigger and Generating More Buzz Than Ever.)
Similarly, the vibrating control on a Playstation or Wii controller is another convenient way to get off. Just don’t tell your boyfriend what you’re up to when you lock yourself in the bedroom with his video games.
Dressing the Part
So you're alone. So what? Does that mean you can't look cute? If clothes and lingerie make you feel sexy, try wearing sexy underwear, stockings or a G-string - whatever floats your boat! For many people, the feeling of silk or nylon on the skin heightens the sensual experience. Or, you can put on your own little strip tease!
If you want to try something different and new, anal play can add another dimension to your solo sessions - and allow you to safely experiment with what you like. Anal vibrators, beads and other toys designed for this type of play can also help enhance the experience. For a very intense orgasm, you could even combine an anal and vaginal vibrator. (Learn more about anal sex in What You Need to Know About Anal Sex.)
So go ahead. Take the time to become an expert on your own body. The best part is that these moves don’t have to be just for you. Teach them to your partner too. There’s always enough pleasure to go around.