Sex Stories We Love: Sexual Assault in VR, Consent Done Right, & No Big Deal?

We’re always going to have questions about sex, and we’re always going to find ourselves in murky waters. Sometimes we learn from others. Sometimes we learn on our own. Some things we find out through harsh realities. Some things come to us with care and compassion.

Sexual Assault in VR

This is why we can’t have nice things, folks! Virtual reality is emerging as a wonderfully adaptive and creative way to experience many different aspects of life, a delightful blend of fantasy and potential. Sure, right now, there is a lot of emphasis on gamefication in VR applications, but don’t be surprised if the emerging technology becomes part of many different aspects of our lives. Sadly, we’re already seeing instances of how VR is mimicking reality - the replication of the sexual harassment that so many women experience as part of their lives. This story is such a sad and enraging example of the absurd beliefs that men learn and accept as entirely acceptable - and then act out through a virtual connection. When a virtual world isn’t even safe, how can our actual world be?

The More You Know About More

You’d get no argument from me if you suggested that non-monogamous relationships will be the next significant social discussion. The groundwork to make this happen has been laid, the key players are being identified, education is beginning to happen, and the time is right. We are truly starting to understand that monogamy is only one very specific construct foisted upon many societies with specific intentions. It is time to expand our opportunities. However, with emerging understanding must come a holistic reflection on what this means. Articles and opinion pieces on non-monogamy in sex circles are frequently overwhelmingly positive...but sometimes to a fault. Instead, it would be great if we were all exposed to thoughtful, considered voices on the many different aspects of non-monogamy that aren’t always captured in the excitement of relationship revolution. An important read.

An Important Journey

First things first, to get it out of the way, I hope the author of this thoughtful discussion on the importance of explicit and enthusiastic consent will reconsider the choice of the word "lame" in this context. It is offensive. It almost made me want to skip his article. That said, his journey on what consent is really about is an important read. It does read a little bit self-aggrandizing at times, but the message is there. Women have a voice and it should always be heard. And, of course, respected.

Consent Done Right

Speaking of consent, this is not something movies and TV have done very well over the years. That is certainly a big reason why so many people have completely fucked up views on consent and why the work that is being done now to undo those ideas is so vitally important. Yet, this isn’t always the case. Sometimes Hollywood actually gets ideas about consent right - in everything from cartoons to vampires to classics. Have you seen these yet?

No Big Deal?

Oh, penis pumps. What the hell are we supposed to think about penis pumps? These much-maligned sexual enhancement devices have been both the butt of jokes for decades as well as an important aid for many people and their sexual satisfaction. On one hand, some believe they can be used to increase the size of a penis with specific use over time. Science doesn’t think these are hard facts. Instead, it might be the opposite. Penis pumps might actually harm the penis instead of making it bigger by causing microfractures and building scar tissue. At the same time, they can be really hot in sexy time situations. Unfortunately, many folks won’t even experience this because they fear that buying or possessing a penis pump may cause them to be viewed as someone with a small penis. And this is a big societal shame point. Is it foolish? Yes. But it exists.

Bachelor, Who?

Finally, who would have thought two contestants on The Bachelor would fall for each other? It just goes to show that love can find folks anywhere, even in the most unusual circumstances.