How to Stay Safe in an Online BDSM Community

Being a modern age kinkster is pretty great. Luckily, the internet has made connecting with and joining the BDSM community significantly easier. Back in the good 'ol days, you had to meet fellow kinksters face to face, and hope that you came across people that shared the same types of BDSM and play that you did.

Online communities, like THE CAGE, are also a fantastic place to dip your toe into the world of BDSM. If you're new to the community and not sure where to start, online communities and forums offer you the opportunity to explore and discover from ease of your home or mobile phone.

That being said, it’s still important for you to keep your own safety in mind too. Navigating the world of BDSM online can be tricky sometimes, so it pays to do a little reading and to always be vigilant.

Here are our top tips for staying safe and making sure you have a fun and fulfilling time.

Staying Anonymous Online

When interacting with an online BDSM community – even one that feels safe, secure, and friendly – it’s crucial to preserve your anonymity. Pick a screen name that has nothing in common with your real name, and make sure to keep your personal information personal. There’s no need to post a clear face picture nor your phone number, or a link to your Facebook profile.

While the best online BDSM communities are secure and private, it’s inevitable that some people will use them with bad intentions – perhaps even to blackmail or take advantage of other people.

By keeping your personal info off your profile, you deny them that opportunity.

Read: Stay Safe: Tips for Protecting Yourself When You're Dating Online

Picking Your Online Community

Before you really settle into an online community, it’s okay to lurk for a while. Leave your profile blank and take a look around. Read the writing of other members, browse forums, and take a look at other profiles. Doing so will help you get a feel for the place, and make up your mind as to whether you want to join in earnest.

A little bit of healthy skepticism is a good thing. If a profile looks too good to be true… well… maybe that’s because it isn’t true! Since BDSM communities are anonymous by default, it can be all too easy for scammers and impersonators to sneak into the community.

The best kinky networking sites know this and do everything they can to address it. Phone verification is one brilliant tool they have at their disposal. By forcing members to register with a real phone number, site owners can cut down on scammers, stop users having multiple identities, and actually hold users who misbehave accountable for their actions.

Look for phone verification when you sign up. Make sure forums are moderated. Make sure you can report anything that looks a little dodgy. These are all signs that a particular BDSM community is healthy and looked-after.

Read: Welcome to the Dungeon: How to Join the BDSM Community

Getting Into a Relationship

It’s pretty normal for people in the BDSM scene to meet their partners online – after all, it’s much easier to seek out people who share your kinky interests on the internet than it is in real life. However, meeting people online requires a little bit of caution.